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I have been called "Mom of the group" like a zillion times, and I am okay with it until you ask me to be someone else. It is just who I am. I just cannot stop caring about everyone.
Have you ever been called “Mom of the group”, just for being the level-headed and cautious one? Well, it is time we stop judging people who care sincerely!
As we move towards a feminist society, which means women having freedom to choose, why are we bashing up the ones who choose to be sincere and caring. I have been called “Mom of the group” like a zillion times, and I am okay with it until you ask me to be someone else.
It is just who I am.
I just cannot stop caring about everyone. I might be paranoid, and I might not be able to pull a night out with my friends.
Likewise, I might not be able to drink carefree and throw my arms over my friends. I do not tolerate sexist jokes and I speak out if I am offended. However, these things might have made me feel out of place a couple of times.
“Will it be safe and okay?” I asked one of my guy friends when we were planning to party one night.
“Why are you like this? You always have issues? Why can’t you be like her?” he referred to one of his other friends.
There is nothing wrong with me, and neither is with her. If she is not judged for drinking and dancing all night, then why am I judged for not doing this? I dance my heart out too, but I keep track of the time as well.
Is it that bad?
Feminism is about letting women choose. It is simply the freedom to do certain things without guilt like building a strong career, being ambitious and having crazy loads of fun as well. However, if we have accepted the women who have crazy loads of fun, why can’t we accept the ones who have moderate amounts of fun as well?
Coming back to my friend, I did confront him and told him that it is unreasonable for him to compare me like that. Well, he hasn’t since then, but I still sense the resentment in his tone when I question a fun plan.
In a nutshell, I do realize I can be a spoilsport sometimes, but it does not give anyone the right to keep comparing me with other girls who according to them are more fun. I am who I am, and I will not do something conflicting with my conscience just to look cool.
This might be a very simple topic to ponder about, but try asking someone like me the “Mom of the group”, and she will tell you how is it a sweet war every single day.
A war between trying to fit in and being true to what you are.
Image source: Still from BuzzFeed India’s Skit: When You’re The Mom Of Your Friend Group, edited on CanvaPro
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Some time ago, Imtiaz Ali and Hansal Mehta respectively spoke of biopics of Madhubala and Meena Kumari. But do these biopics do justice to these women?
I recently came across a Reddit thread that discussed the fact that filmmaker Imtiaz Ali had announced making a biopic of Madhubala, and I wanted to explore this a little.
Of late, biopics based on the lives of beautiful but fatefully tragic women such as Lady Diana and Marilyn Monroe have created waves. Closer at home, we hear about the possibilities of biopics being made on the lives of Meena Kumari and Madhubala as well. These were hugely famous, stunningly beautiful women who were the heartthrobs of millions; who died tragically young.
I am glad that the Orange Flower Awards seek self-nomination. High achieving women often suffer from self-doubt, and this is a good way to remind us that we are good enough.
A few days ago, I saw an Instagram post announcing the Orange Flower Awards which recognise the power of women’s voices. I read about it with curiosity, but didn’t give it a second thought.
I received an e mail from Women’s Web seeking self-nominations for the Orange Flower Awards, and I ignored it. Yes, I write occasionally, but I didn’t think my work was good enough for me to nominate myself in any of the categories.
A past winner especially tagged me and asked me to look at nominating myself, and I told her that I was not ready yet. “That is up to you”, she said, “but I think you should nominate yourself.”
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