Starting A New Business? 7 Key Points To Keep In Mind.

When Virat Dedicated His T20 Century To Anushka And Publicly Recognised Her Contribution!

When partners support each other in their respective intellectual pursuits, it enriches their relationship. Like that of Virat Kohli and Anushka Sharma.

It’s time we acknowledge women’s intellectual contributions publicly. #CoupleGoals

Virat Kohli recently celebrated a milestone by scoring his first T20I century against Afghanistan. Chances are, if you’re on social media, you wouldn’t have missed the picture of him celebrating it by planting a kiss on his wedding ring.

Anushka gave him perspective during tough times

The cricketer went through a difficult phase where he had a century drought that lasted almost 1000 days.

Talking about this tough time after the match, he dedicated the century to the love of his life, Anushka Sharma, and their daughter Vamika. Speaking about his challenging times, he mentions how Anushka stood by him in these difficult times and “put things in right perspective” (sic).

This is heartwarming, as Anushka has often been unfairly blamed for Virat’s unsatisfactory past performances, showing how some people view women as mere “distractions”.

Indian cricketers heavily criticised for picking an active part in family life

It is well known that being a sportsperson isn’t always easy. They are considered to be on ‘national duty’ as they represent the country. Cricket is almost a religion in India, more than ‘just a sport’. One can imagine how the spouse would have had to step up on many occasions.

There have been multiple times when cricketers have even missed the birth of their child due to a tour or an important game. Again, Kohli is someone who broke the norm and took paternity leave to be with Anushka during the last leg of her pregnancy. Doing so, he had to miss the last 3 matches of the Indian tour to Australia in 2020. This was widely criticized and he was trolled heavily for choosing his family over ‘national duty’, contrary to what MS Dhoni did in 2015, missing the birth of his child.

Women are capable of actively contributing, not just ‘sacrificing’

I don’t mean to say that cricketers have never praised their wives. There have been multiple occasions where some cricketers have thanked their wives for the ‘sacrifices’ they had to make due to the nature of this game. While this is true, and women should definitely be given public credit for all the invisible labor they do, one does not often see the intellectual contribution that she makes.

Never miss real stories from India's women.

Register Now

So, when I read a dedication to a wife/mother that mentioned something other than the sacrifices she made, it feels like a step forward from what we assume women’s roles are. It is time that we stop portraying women as people incapable of doing anything other than ‘sacrificing’ for the family’s sake.

Look at any social occasion – how men and women are approached differently

I am a stay-at-home mother by choice. Our circumstances did not allow me to return to work after the birth of my daughter, and this slowly extended to a 5-year hiatus in my career.

People often struggle to make small talk with me. Their inquiries are mostly about our children. Some people are ignorant enough to ask me how I “pass time”. Little they do know that if I had time to ‘pass’, I would be able to accomplish so much more!

Whereas, when I see the conversations that my husband has, I can see it start mostly with “How is work?”. The conversation then comfortably moves to current affairs, politics, finances, personal growth, and so on. Most people assume women are incapable of being intellectual beings and wouldn’t be able to contribute in any way to such topics.

I contribute to my husband’s work – he regularly asks for my perspective

Given that we are a nuclear family with 2 little kids, it is quite difficult for me and my husband to hold conversations during the day. Our favorite ritual post our kids’ bedtime is the long discussions we have about varied topics.

There have also been multiple times when my husband has asked my advice on his work issues. Being in a senior managerial position, he often faces situations where there is no one right thing to do, and he often requires perspective from another person to understand things better.

The intellectual connection that we both feel after we have such lengthy conversations is an unparalleled feeling. I feel a sense of accomplishment when he thanks me for giving an important perspective that helps him make crucial decisions.

Women display managerial skills every day in their homes

Women often juggle so much more than their share, and their invisible mental load is ridiculously high. Isn’t this proof enough of them having good managerial and people skills? Trust me, if every woman had a good support system and our societal norms were evolved enough to distribute our domestic load evenly, our workspaces would see a lot more women leaders.

Enriching each other’s lives is more meaningful than a one-sided sacrifice

My husband was the one who showed me Kohli’s speech as he knew it would strike a chord with me. We also had a lengthy conversation about how women are seen in the public eye. It gave me a lot to think about and was the seed of this article.

When partners support each other in their respective intellectual pursuits, it enriches their relationship. That is what should be normalized, as opposed to a woman always having to understand and sacrifice her personal goals for others.

Image source: Instagram

Liked this post?

Register at Women's Web to get our weekly mailer and never miss out on our events, contests & best reads - you can also start sharing your own ideas and experiences with thousands of other women here!


About the Author

Jayashree Ravi

An engineer turned SAHM of two who wants to be known beyond that. Passionate about words, parenting, making eco-friendly choices, feminism and lifelong learning. read more...

24 Posts | 11,154 Views

Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!

Women Leaders in Communications Discuss The Responsible 5G Revolution We Need

All Categories