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The torture which these women and girls are facing is not just physical, it's mental and emotional as well.
The lady whom I had written about in my earlier blog – Did she have a choice, has a younger sister in law who was pregnant with twins.
Guess what? She delivered beautiful twin baby girls last night.
The family should be extremely happy they’re blessed with two healthy baby girls and the mother is doing fine too, though she’s in immense pain due to C-section.
“Kaash ek beta hota!” (Wish one of the twins was a boy). Even the father of the girls doesn’t look excited, rather he’s still here and his wife and newborns are in the village. He plans to go there after a few days. I don’t think it would be the same if his wife had delivered a boy or rather if both were boys.
I happened to talk to the elder daughter in law, who herself has gone through three C-Sections for the family’s wish to have a male heir, she too didn’t sound excited when she gave me the news. Her words, “Hamare mein beta toh hona hi chahiye.”
She said the elders in the family are never okay till a male child is born, he will be the one to carry the legacy forward. Also when parents are ageing, who will take care of them? How can they stay with the daughter, what will people say? What if her in-laws don’t like it?
I was like, “Which world are you living in, grow up, it’s high time your generation starts making the change in this kind of mindset. How can you educated people to talk this kind of stuff!”
I was shocked beyond words listening to what she had to say. I’m appalled to see the condition of these young girls who are still going through this kind of torture. The torture is not just physical, it’s mental and emotional as well.
Not sure whether it’s entirely the family to blame, as somewhere inside them they too nurture the thought of having a male child, after all, that’s the thought put into their minds since the time they were born, “Beta toh hona hi chahiye!”
It’s high time, these kind of outdated thoughts need to change.
Male or female child is determined by the composition of the chromosomes, that too the chromosome given by the father. If he passes on the X chromosome it’s a girl, only if Y chromosome is passed from him it’s a boy. Then why is the lady giving birth blamed, looked down upon, cursed, if she gives birth to a female child?
Image Source: Still from the TV Serial Na Aana is Des Laado
Mother to a bubbly teenager and a student of psychology, Heena is also a travel enthusiast.
She loves to observe the happenings around her and weave them into beautiful stories.
A writer with a passion read more...
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"There is a story and a vision which makes us gravitate towards cinema. Even as we worked as assistants on ads, we realised that cinema was our true calling," say Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh Raseen.
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Let me introduce to you the talented designer duo who have worked on these, and can be considered today’s upcoming costume designers for the screen. Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh.
Having studied at NIFT, Gunpreet Kaur Mann sent her portfolio out to several designers. Her first gig was as an assistant stylist with Manoshi and Rushi, who also happen to be a designer duo. She worked on an ad film starring Saif Ali Khan and eventually landed a full time job with designer Vikram Phadnis. Years of experience as assistant costume designer followed, which eventually led her to getting a break.
A ‘thank you’ makes a lot of difference in the way any woman in your life sees herself in your eyes. It might even mean the world to her.
I have not received any appreciation in the past. Probably never will. This is the experience of ample women across the globe. The expectation to be thanked for all the sacrifices she makes to keep others happy has faded. Yet the urge to hear few words of acknowledgement always lingers.
There is never a day when she pushes off her own burdens. She knows not to give up on people she loves. Women in general, are givers by nature and hence, give without asking anything in return. They have been the care givers and lovers since centuries however receive no appreciation.
It will mean the world to your mother if you answer her calls. If your sister seems lost give her a hug and assure her about her strengths. Tomorrow, there might come a day when you would have to make your daughter feel empowered with few words of wisdom every now and then. For the children to feel wanted and loved, you must be able to spare some quality time with your wife and be present in the moment.
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