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Women of my generation represent the calculated changes in the Indian woman. A woman from this generation loves herself and values herself as much as she does her family!
The concept of self-love is still gaining momentum in India, each generation is hesitantly adopting this. The generation that is as old as independent India is far from this vibe as opposed to the new age girls who from a young age absolutely and unabashedly put themselves first.
This makes me think of two sets of generations that are yet to fully adopt and adapt to putting themselves first although one generation is changing the game to a large extent.
Let me start with my mother’s generation, women between 50-65 years of age. This age bracket envelopes within itself ages of experience no doubt, but they have seen the evolution of the Indian women over these past few decades.
I see the tussle they go through, to stick to what they have been taught and abide by rules and roles. Yet there is this inquisitiveness to delve into the role of self-love before self-sacrifice.
Women of my mother’s generation are the perfect sacrificial entity of any family; they completely bury their needs and desires for their family. It all starts by being the doting daughter who doesn’t question her parents. To be a devoted wife who doesn’t give her two cents on anything. To be a mother who gets lost in another life only to see that her child having a life of his own and
There is no harm in being a doting daughter, our parents do a lot for us and if we can support them in any way we always should. There is no crime in being a dutiful wife, marriage is not made on whims and a spouse should be an anchor or oar as per demands of life. There definitely is no bad being a loving mother who gives her all to a beautiful child.
But every relationship cannot come before our own selves.
As far as my generation is concerned (the women of the late 1980s to early 1990s), we have seen our mothers either stay true to traditions or grow with life and evolve.
But most importantly we have made certain changes to the way we immerse ourselves in people we love.
Women of this age bracket represent the calculated changes in the Indian woman. This woman knows that to be a good daughter, she also needs to make something of her life and be worthy enough as an individual to stand on her own two feet.
This woman knows she has to be her husband’s friend and confidant as well as a good advisor for the marriage to be equal. This woman knows she has to bring up her child in a way that her child will live her life in the most genuine and wonderful way.
This woman loves herself first so that she can love others. This woman doesn’t sacrifice but she amicably adjusts. This woman doesn’t control but respectfully gives her opinions. This woman is a representation of all the good of yesterday and all the good of tomorrow.
Each day I aspire to be more like this woman. For she is truly the epitome of genuine love and honest care, no strings attached.
Image source: Pexels/Olha Ruskykh
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I recommend reading Manjiri Indurkar's Origami Aai alongside her memoir to have a fulfilling and enriching experience of telling one's story with grace.
It’s All In Your Head, M famed author Manjiri Indurkar’s debut poetry collection, Origami Aai, is independent and yet an extension of her memoir in which she speaks with utmost grace about all forms of abuses that she has survived. In this book of intriguing and evocative poems, the poet weaves words to form images of the everyday life of her middle-class family, love found and lost, trauma, and healing.
The collection is divided into four segments, beginning with the family, slowly moving towards the world, and finally colliding them together.
We aren’t in mourning, but we are creatures of habit.
So we talk of each one who died of drowning,
and I listen to her stories with the patience
of a chronicler.
– Funereal Stories
Homemakers or as we often call them, 'housewives' are IMO the most underestimated and disrespected of women. Time this changed.
I am so glad to write about this as homemakers were and till are the most undervalued and underestimated.
Having grown up in Indian society, I have witnessed people disrespecting homemakers by delivering various comments like, “saara din ghar par to hoti ho karti kya ho” (being at home what do you do full day), “housewives ke pass to bahut time hota hai” (housewives have a lot of time), “subah kaam hota hai fir to free hi free saara din” (you have work in the morning and then you are free the whole day).
I am a working woman and I confess that I can go to work because earlier my mother and now my mother-in-law share responsibilities with me. People feel the work of a homemaker is easy but honestly, it’s not. I see my mother-in-law waking up at 6 am and working non-stop till night. In fact, I would say the life of some working individuals are much more sorted and simple than that of a homemaker.
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