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When men label a woman as 'sensible', it isn't always a compliment. What other words have been twisted out of meaning, to suit a man's purpose?
When men label a woman as ‘sensible’, it isn’t always a compliment. What other words have been twisted out of meaning, to suit a man’s purpose?
My neighbour Martha is a hardworking woman. She is good at juggling a lot of things, be it minor plumbing work, carpentry work in the house, or homeschooling her kids during Covid. She is good at navigation, driving, and yes, housekeeping.
She is not single though. She has a cheerful husband who is fond of golf, bird photography, and catching up with his cronies every other evening at the Golf Club.
Unlike him, Martha even knows the medicine routine of his parents.
Everyone knows Martha or has at least noticed her. Maybe you have also witnessed her during your trip to the grocery store, where she is balancing five grocery bags in one hand and her child in another.
‘Martha is such a sensible woman!’ A man almost announced in the midst of a social gathering.
‘Sensible? How?’ I asked.
‘She never complains, throws no tantrums, and unlike most other women, doesn’t bug others for help in this and that. She knows how to manage things on her own.’
The man almost sounded envious of her husband.
So, if you are a hardworking mule, good at managing, are a non-demanding, non-troubling superwoman… and yes, always well-composed in public, then you are a Sensible Woman.
How many of you are this Sensible?
That’s another definition with patriarchal colours struck off from my dictionary today. Have you come across other such skewed definitions? Homely, mature, grounded, marriage type or Sada-Suhagan... What other dictionary terms has patriarchy adapted to its own twisted means?
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Vartika Sharma Lekhak is a published author based in India who enjoys writing on social issues, travel tales and short stories. She is an alumnus of JNU and currently studying law at Symbiosis Law School, read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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