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Don't take homemakers for granted! If they stop doing what they are doing, your house will be a dump full of dirty utensils and laundry!
Don’t take homemakers for granted! If they stop doing what they are doing, your house will be a dump full of dirty utensils and laundry!
Homemaker:- /ˈhəʊmmeɪkə/- a person who manages a home and often raises children instead of earning money from a job.
I have read a few articles about the lives of a homemaker and appreciated every one of them. Thus, I am going to list out a few things that go beyond the basic definition of a ‘homemaker.’ It is, according to me, the ‘Homemaker 101,’ so to speak.
A homemaker doesn’t have a specific gender. Did you know this? Well, I am here to enlighten you. (However, mostly homemakers are women.) If you think of a homemaker and the first thing that comes to mind is a woman sitting on a couch all day, correct yourself! A homemaker can be anyone.
In reality, a homemaker does NOT sit on a couch all day. A homemaker rarely escapes the daily chores which you very conveniently put on them, because, ‘hey! They have nothing else to do.’ Apart from cleaning after you, they have too many things crammed in one day.
Doing the laundry, folding it, calling the plumber, going to the bank, making a list of places to visit on the next vacation and making bookings. They also manage the cooking, taking the kids to their hobby classes and tuitions and vacuuming the stupid couch, they do it all. This list is endless.
So the next time you ask a homemaker what they do during their day, think twice. There may be times when they pause doing what they do and sit on the couch, but they rarely stop.
Being a homemaker is a choice – a personal one. Like you choose to be an earning member of your family, a homemaker chooses to take care of the house. All you need to do is respect that.
If a homemaker is learning a new skill or an art form and trying to build a business out of it, appreciate and respect it. Don’t snigger or demean them by saying that it’s a good way to pass their time.
Art is not a pass time, it is a gift. If you have it, nurture it. And if you don’t know what interests you, look for it. Instead of sniggering and demean the homemaker, spend your time developing some skill or an art.
A homemaker doesn’t have time to binge-watch stuff. You do that on Sundays and other vacation days. But a homemaker never gets any leaves or vacations. Every day might be the same but it is still way different from the others.
They, too, have a set routine – like you have your stand-up meetings. If they miss an errand, there will be a thousand fingers pointing at them, including yours.
A homemaker doesn’t always take that afternoon nap you think they do. But if they do, they are entitled to it. Unlike some of you who are glued to a terminal all day, they do a lot of physical work and get tired. Some times, more than you!
Don’t take homemakers for granted! If they stop doing what they are doing, your house will be a dump of dirty utensils and laundry among others! Your house will have leaking taps, unpaid electricity bills and a messy backyard.
I cannot emphasise this enough – there is no shame in being a homemaker. None at all. And if you feel that way, the world will only make you feel worse.
So now that every one of us has been through the lockdowns and the self-isolation, I am hoping we understand homemakers better. Though we still don’t have to go to the bank or drop the kids anywhere, do we?
Picture credits: Still from Marathi TV series Agga Bai Sasubai
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Manasi Diwakar is a writer, and sucker for love stories. When not writing or reading or imagining romances, you will find her racing with her nephew. Manasi is also a trained classical dancer who thinks read more...
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Before expecting the daughter in law to love, respect and accept the new family, it is only fair that the family demonstrates all of these first.
If you are a married Indian woman, one of the first words you hear from your in laws is that you are now a daughter of the house. How true is that statement though? Are daughters in law really treated as daughters or is this only lip service?
A friend recently confided how hurt she felt when she wanted to visit her in-laws along with her husband but was told not to, because the in-laws wanted time alone with their son. Naturally, she was taken aback since she had always been fed this trope – that she was the daughter, not the daughter in law. Why then this sudden keeping at arm’s distance? Would a son in law ever be told not to accompany his wife on her visit to her parents because they wanted quality time with their daughter? That is unimaginable in a patriarchal society.
It is ok to want time alone with the married offspring but how does that meld into the Indian family system, where independent choices are less important than the whole family coming together?
My husband returns home tired after working & travelling. I, like other working women, return home refreshed after enjoying full day at office!
I am a working woman and mother of a 2 year old daughter. People say I am irresponsible and lazy because I have a house-help.
Yes, I’m irresponsible and don’t have any work. Except checking what groceries needs to be refilled and ordering them for home delivery, washing my and my husband’s clothes, drying and folding them, getting the work-wear clothes ironed, keeping clothes in place, cleaning bathrooms and toilets, changing bedsheets, dusting windows occasionally, hand washing my daughter’s soiled clothes in hot water, bathing my daughter twice, feeding my daughter breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Rest other work like cooking and house cleaning done by the house-help and my husband takes care of getting fruits and vegetables from the market every week. So I don’t have any work except those few mentioned earlier.
I have been a homemaker all my life, but I don't remember a time I didn't write or paint or study. So I've honed my skills over a lifetime.
I have been a homemaker all my life, but I don’t remember a time I didn’t write or paint or study. So I’ve honed my skills over a lifetime.
Most homemakers carry a small seed of shame, one that gradually blossoms into a poisonous tree each time someone asks you what you do and you don’t find the appropriate words. You mumble homemaker or stay-at-home mother and if the person asking the question is somewhat woke they launch into a lengthy platitudinous speech about it being the hardest and most important job and you want to scream, “Then pay me!”
But mostly the word homemaker is followed by a small, tense silence after which you are ignored, for homemakers can have nothing of worth to say, can they?
Mira Rajput's recent comments on being a homemaker went viral and led to all of social media slamming her. Here's a different point of view.
Mira Rajput’s recent comments on being a homemaker went viral and led to all of social media slamming her. Here’s a different point of view.
Recently Shahid Kapoor’s wife Mira Rajput created a furore on the Internet by making a funny statement that ‘innocently’ compared a baby with a puppy, following which she gave her preference for being a homemaker. I did not like the comparison personally. Why Mira, is not a pup a baby too? In fact, children outgrow your lap, but dogs don’t! I don’t have a pet but I know pet parents who shower unconditional love on their pets.
Somehow, her statement just rubbed many women the wrong way. I, for one, understood only one thing – Mira forgot that the position from where she is speaking held more weight than her words themselves!