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I’m A New Mom But That Doesn’t Mean You Can Shame Me Online For My Choices!

Posted: April 13, 2020

In the times of social media, new moms are constantly shamed and trolled on social media for their choices. They’re learning too, so why not support them?

Mom shaming, either intentional or not, cuts deep. Mothers are considered to be superwomen. And some times, this phrase is more of a burden, than being empowering. Society seems to have forgotten that we are humans too. And yes, we are flawed. Due to all this, every ounce of my blood advocates and demands normality for young mothers.

Social media galore! It has some unrealistic expectations from young mothers. Not only are they expected to constantly feel blessed about their motherhood but also enjoy every single moment without complaints.

Real issues don’t matter, do they?

Real issues like postpartum depression, sore boobs & breastfeeding complications, baby blues, all are shoved under the rug. New moms are always under microscope- shamed or bullied for the parenting choices they make.

Right from their birthing choice or their choice to nurse the babies in public- they are attacked. Whether they switch to formula feed or admit their children into day daycare. For their choice of taking a vacation with the infant or co-sleeping with them. Moms are constantly judged and attacked.

This ruthless act of bullying moms online has reached to a whole new level in recent years. We are already dealing with our own uncertainties and struggling to figure out things that works for our babies. And at this juncture what we least expect is the cruel judgement and criticism howled our way for trying to parent our kid.

And then, moms shaming each other is something else

The worst is one mom shaming another- bearing the brunt of that is excruciating. How easy is it to hide behind that screen and mercilessly criticise someone because they made a different choice than you!

There have been instances, where a new mom was criticised and bullied to the extent that she was pushed into the dark world of depression and had to seek help! Isn’t that brutal? Did she deserve it? And for what? For making her parenting decisions and choice public? It breaks my heart!

These words are more piercing than a weapon. Trust me ‘not everything works’ and there are more than thousand ways of doing it. In the end, we all want to do best for our child.

Sometimes I feel, people who shame others are insecure over their own decisions. They just do it to validate their own parenting abilities. And social media is the easiest way to vent out by blaming and shaming others for no particular reason.

I understand the vulnerability but not the bashing

Being on social media, I understand the vulnerability of the platform and the position I put myself into. But does it mean that I need to be prepared for the bashing since I’ve opened doors for people to peep in my life and judge me?

My pictures or videos are not any kind of invitation card that reads “call me names.” There is much larger and greater perspective involved, but who wants to know that?

Personally, social media has been a happy place for me. I am grateful for all the mom tribes & support groups. The ones who has helped me in getting through parenthood and we have each other’s back always. Therefore, I choose to stay here, get inspired and spread positivity.

Now how to get over the negativity, well, I do not obsess over the mom shaming comments. Yes, at times I do give out polite but stern replies. But most of the time I just let it go. I choose to not respond. Brooding over their hurtful statements are not going to make us any better or less. Period! My Only message for these know-it-all crusaders is Get Well Soon, Mamma Mia!

Picture credits: Pexels

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She is an enthusiast who loves donning several caps. She is an Anchor, Voice-artist &

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