If You Were Alexa No One Will Buy You Daddy, Because You Never Listen

"Because daddy, mummy keeps repeating things when she talks to you and you keep asking what. If you are Alexa, nobody will buy you."

“Because daddy, mummy keeps repeating things when she talks to you and you keep asking what. If you are Alexa, nobody will buy you.”

“Alexa, volume 10!” commanded Ashok in his authoritative voice and turned to the guests, winked and said, “She is the only woman who listens, you see.”

Raj laughed out loud, while his wife Shikha signaled to him not to make any comments as their ten year old son, Aarav, was seated right there.

Aarav quickly looked at his Dad and said, “Papa! Mummy’s name should be Alexa.”

Ashok’s wife, Ritu retorted, “Beta, don’t listen to what your uncle says. It makes no sense. Go and play.”

Aarav: “Yes aunty. Uncle is right. Alexa is the only woman who listens. But my mummy is better than Alexa.”

Shikha: “Why are you comparing me with a robot beta?”

Aarav: “Because Mumma you are better than Alexa. You do so much without us telling you.”

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Ashok laughed and said, “Kids will be kids.”

Aarav continued: “I wish Daddy was Alexa.”

Raj: “Oh I don’t wish to be a woman.”

Aarav: “But why Dad?”

Raj: “Go and play.”

Aarav: “Oh! I know why. Because daddy, you are a man and it is not your job to look for your socks in the morning.”

Shikha and Ritu burst out laughing. Watching them laugh, Aarav was encouraged and motivated to speak more.

Aarav continued, “Oh and because Daddy, you go in to have a bath without your towel and once you are done you call out to mummy. I was thinking, Alexa remembers everything, but even though you’ve taken a bath everyday for so many years, still you forget to take your towel. So, I wish you were Alexa.”

Ritu smirked and said (to Ashok): “I wish you were Alexa.”

Shikha and Ritu were having a ball of a time now.

Aarav: “Aunty, I wish uncle Ashok was Alexa too because then he would have known why Alexa listens and that she is not a woman. She is just a robot who will not make these tasty dishes that you have made for us.”

Ashok (laughing): “So you think your Dad and I should be Alexa?”

Aarav: “No I think it’s a bad idea.”

Raj: “Why?”

Aarav: “But Daddy, you really cannot be like Alexa.”

Raj: “Why?”

Aarav: “Because daddy, mummy keeps repeating things when she talks to you and you keep asking what. If you are Alexa, nobody will buy you.”

Raj took the remote and turned the TV on, trying not to react.

Shikha and Ritu kept laughing.

Aarav (continues): “Now just watch. Daddy has the remote in his hand. He won’t be listening to what we are talking.”

Ritu told Ashok: “See how much is rooted in the child’s mind with just one statement of yours.”

Ashok: “What did I say?”

Ritu: “Oh didn’t you say that Alexa is the only woman who listens.”

Ashok: “Ah. Yeah..but…”

Shikha: “That’s right. Words matter a lot. We should be careful with what we say in front of kids. Gender equality begins at home.”

Ashok: “You must be crazy. Don’t take it so seriously.”

Aarav: “Mummy. I think when I grow up I will be a Daddy but also be like Alexa. I will listen.”

The dumbstruck Ashok joined Raj in watching TV, while the women cackled and bubbled with laughter while they settled each others invisible crowns.

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Natasha Perry Thomas

Blogger, Writer and Content Curator. Author of 'Infidelity-An Outrageously Funny Affair and The Ultimate Rom-Com' - available on Kindle. read more...

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