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Board exams and results are not the most important thing in life, though it doesn't feel like that at the moment. How do you stay calm at such times?
Board exams and results are not the most important thing in life, though it doesn’t feel like that at the moment. How do you stay calm at such times?
I asked myself several times if I should pen this to you, and finally I decided I should. Hope you spare a moment to read…
Ten years down the line, no one is going to remember your ‘score’ from the board exams. It is important, I won’t tell you otherwise. But, those numbers are not going to ‘irrefutably’ determine the course of who you finally evolve into.
Remember, it is diversity that makes the Earth beautiful. We need the grass as much as we need the tall oaks. Else, Earth and its sentient beings would’ve been assembly line products, not part of an amazing evolutionary process! Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.
A great maxim to live by. You may have parents who understand that or you may have parents who pressurize, I understand. But ultimately, it is you who has been given the responsibility and the honour of taking care of ‘You’ – this unique combination of strengths and weaknesses.
Do not allow scathing remarks by the significant adults in your life undermine you. Of course, if you are not giving it your best for your board exams, not using your strengths, then you definitely need some speaking to! But, if you are, then never mind the rest.
It is perfectly alright to feel overwhelmed at times. The best among us experiences it too. For, who ever promised life will be a boring straight line?
It is perfectly okay to feel sad at times. But, deliberately counter it with a beautiful moment or memory. It can be simple, just go and hug your equally tense parent/ significant adult (even if they are grouchy), or look up at the skies, or go out and treat yourself to an ice cream, or just close your eyes and breathe deep, pat yourself and whisper, ‘I’m there for you, no worries’… just do something to let the ‘moment’ pass, be it anything!
And, if you can’t beat those blues by yourself, reach out to someone who will listen. If you need help, do not hesitate, ask! Tell your significant adult that your ‘sadness’ threatens to overwhelm and you need help. When faced with bare facts, people do help. I repeat, do not hesitate.
You might be the straight ‘A+’ scorer or you might score other grades, but whatever it is, decide that you will be there for all your peers. Decide that apart from your significant adults and the higher education forms you fill, no one ‘needs’ to hear your percentile. If they don’t know, they can’t compare. Remember, in life very few people question because they really care. Plus, do you know what your parent/your head teacher scored in 1961; who scored more and who scored less? Does it matter now?
Life gives you choices and chances, don’t be convinced otherwise. Remember, it is perseverance that paid off in the ‘Hare & Tortoise’ race.
All the very best to you, my dear.
First published here.
I write about Life, as I see it... It is my lifeline to sanity. A psychiatric social worker by training, an erst while journalist by chance, technical writer by plan and now, a home maker read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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