Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
An intensely personal and honest account of why she keeps the karvachauth fast despite no pressure to do so, Prerna Wahi's words make you believe in the romance of it all.
An intensely personal and honest account of why she keeps the karvachauth fast despite no pressure to do so, Prerna Wahi’s words make you believe in the romance of it all.
Some of my friends are keeping the karvachauth fast owing to the customs in their in-laws’ house, others are keeping it having grown up seeing their mothers keep it, year on year. Some are treating it as an excuse to dress up, while others are simply giving their friends company.
My reasons are none of these. Neither my mother in law nor my mother fasts on this day.
My reason is purely love for my husband. He is not a perfect person but is as close to perfect for me, as can be. He is not keeping the fast today to accompany me and I appreciate his honesty. He is not showering me with gifts to impress me. He is not the toughest or most handsome man I know (I am not going to hear the end of this from him!). But he does all these little things that matter, and his humility is so endearing.
Every year we have this discussion on why I need to fast and he promises me a gift if I actually don’t keep it, but ultimately he graciously accepts and respects my decision to fast all day. He also honours our annual tradition of taking me out for a special lavish dinner on this night and watches a famished me eat like there’s no tomorrow.
He is the cool head when I’m getting cranky due to pangs of hunger. He still brings a smile on my face every time he looks at me. He compliments me when I wear something new. He is the man I always dreamt of and now is my reality.
My fast today (in addition to the traditional reasons of praying for his long life and getting him in all my future lives, which I truly do not believe in) is a small way of expressing my love for him. I do not follow rituals as strictly as they are meant to be. I choose convenience and practicality any day. I may skip the traditional mehendi or purchasing a new outfit for the occasion. I may even not wake up pre-dawn to eat as I value my sleep more. I may have water through the day to avoid getting dehydrated. I may not remember the ‘Kahani’ inspite of listening to it every year. I may even choose a light comfortable outfit to grace the occasion. But in the end, it’s something I choose to do in my own way and relish it.
Indian traditions often are targeted as regressive and illogical. To each his own. This one has a special place in my heart, and I will continue following it as long as I can because I know “I don’t have to do it instead I want to do it”.
In that is true liberation.
Prerna Wahi worked in the corporate world for 7 years. In the past few years, she has been a stay-at-home mom. She has been enjoying the new role ever since and likes to read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
Please enter your email address