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Swara Bhaskar did it in Veere Di Wedding; so did Kiara Advani in Lust Stories. But it is still a taboo when a regular Indian woman talks of masturbation or orgasms.
Deviating from my usual stance of writing about safe things, I have decided to talk about a bold topic this time. All around me, I see, hear, read and watch a number of things about diversity, gender equality, feminism et cetera.
But very rarely do people address the topic of a woman’s sexuality. In the Indian context, we talk about sex in whispers and especially if you are a woman, the subject is a total taboo.
Growing up, I used to argue with my mother about curfew times, protesting that it did not mean that I was a virgin if I was home before dark or if I stayed out late.
My mother however, never bought that argument and like a lawyer came up with counter arguments faster than you could say “Jack Robinson”. Of course as a parent, she had safety and security issues on her mind.
Over the years, I realized that if you want to be “acceptable” in the eyes of the society you live in, you DO NOT come across as a person with normal sexual desires.
It is ok for a man to sleep around, he is just playing the field before settling down. If a woman does the same thing, she is labelled a slut, a whore or worse.
What’s even more irritating is that women are judged by the way they dress. Last year, a colleague wore a deep necked top to work and was harassed a couple of times. The response to that by someone in a position of authority was that she should dress down a little.
When would we start feeling comfortable walking on the streets in a pair of shorts without being labelled “loose” or worse, being afraid of being raped for wearing a mini skirt?
In social circles, a man having an extra marital affair is not as condemned as the other woman he is having it with. Are they not equally to blame? I am not promoting promiscuity or cheating on your partner, but my point is that rules should apply to all and not to a particular sex.
We have come a long way towards making women an integral part of the society, but unless we do away with such archaic notions and learn to accept each person for what they are, we shall be not be making real progress.
My advice to all the free souls out there is to live your life on your terms and not be swayed by the fools braying by the road side.
Go for it, gals!
Picture Courtesy: Screenshot from Netflix
First published at author’s blog
About Indrani Ghosh nee Chaudhuri
In the fourth decade of my life, I decided that I needed something more. I needed to tell everyone my story, but in a way that people would read it. read more...
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Half a decade ago marriage was a bargain between two famlies. Most of the women were married off to a man who was either well off or who could fend for his wife and family. Today the parameters of marriage have changed. Women no longer marry for the sake of economic security. Their expectations from marriage have changed in the course of years because of their changed status.
As women grew independent, their patterns of choosing partners have changed dramatically. Now women choose men who they feel can satiate their emotional as well as physical needs. Intimacy is no longer the physicality that happened between two people under the supervision of elders of the family for the sole purpose of procreation. Intimacy in today’s marriages involve understanding and fulfilling each other’s emotional as well as sexual needs.
So before you decide to hook up see if you know these five things about intimacy.
The recent Bold Care ad breaks some long standing taboos in Indian society about women's sexual pleasure and erectile dysfunction in men.
The co-owner of the new sexual health brand – Bold Care, Ranveer Singh, recently shared that he wants to focus at creating awareness amongst people about men’s sexual health and aims to provide a tangible solution to millions of people across the country. The new Bold Care ad which was dropped last week has taken the internet by storm. Netizens are ogling at the ad and cannot stop talking about it and how?
The Bold Care ad has created a buzz for multiple reasons. One, because of the unexpected collaboration between the A-list Bollywood actor and co-owner of the brand – Ranveer Singh and (wait for it… drumrolls please) the adult film star Johnny Sins.
People were not ready to see Johnny Sins in an Indian commercial ad and had their jaws dropped to the floor when they saw him dressed in a blue kurta and a golden coat and tie acting in a saas-bahu rip off. The internauts have claimed this unusual duo as the biggest crossover ever – bigger than Deadpool and Wolverine coming together! Second, the ad aims to normalise the stigma related to men’s sexual wellbeing and the ease with which it can be addressed.
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