Being in love with many people at the same time doesn’t make you a slut, and Radhika Apte has finally said it for all of us!
‘Hooks up with so many guys, such a slut, Oh! My god she flirts with everyone! Such a man grabber!” comments like these are pretty common for women who explore the possibility of love out there because obviously ‘a lady should always be a one-man woman’, right?
Well no, not right, and the very talented actress Radhika Apte has finally said it for all of us.
Radhika Apte has been always the talk of the town for speaking what she feels is right. Recently the actor opened up about her philosophy around love when she appeared on an episode of BFFs with Vogue Season 3, aired on Colors Infinity.
“Of course you get tempted. You don’t have to be an actor to be tempted. In life, you meet so many people and there are so many wonderful people and you get tempted. Sometimes it’s a physical attraction, sometimes it’s just admiration and that can be very potent also and I think that’s beautiful. Why would you not address that aspect of your life?”
She also commented on the fact that how sometimes we blame ourselves for the natural emotion of falling with many people at the same time –
“I believe in falling in love with many people. I love too many people at the same time also on various levels and in various ways. Like how I could love dancing and acting, why can’t I love you and you in different ways? So I don’t punish myself or tell myself ‘Oh my God, what happened’,” she said.
Not just this she also commented on the concept of monogamy
“Monogamy or being with one person has to be a choice made every day. It can’t be a compulsion. I need to make that choice every day, wake up and say this is the person I want to be with.” She said she is lucky to have a husband like Benedict Taylor.
Radhika with her bold statements has once again given an answer to many people who question the idea of falling in love many times.
It’s not new for people to judge men and women for having temptations. Although women are judged more than men, because obviously ‘ladka zyada score kar raha hai to stud and ladki kare to slut’ (if a boy ‘scores’ he’s a stud, if a woman does, she’s a slut).
There is the patriarchal belief that “women are meant to be monogamous, bring up the babies, and thus propagate the species, while men are meant to spread their seed.” The underlying assumption is that women aren’t really into sex — that we value motherhood and shopping more. Because of this belief, many who feel attracted to other men/women who aren’t their partners could feel crushed by the guilt.
But women are just as human as men, and being tempted or falling in love with many people is something that is natural irrespective of your gender.
We need to understand that no one should be forced to follow monogamy, and neither should people feel guilty of their temptations; because long-term commitment is hard. So if you feel attracted to many people at times, then don’t feel guilty. Because attraction is natural and people need to respect this.
I read, I write, I dream and search for the silver lining in my life. Being a student of mass communication with literature and political science I love writing about things that bother me. Follow read more...
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This strange love story reminds me of Princess Diana when she gave an interview about Prince Charles - "There were three of us in this marriage!”
This love was flawed and broken the way only we humans know how to break things with our ego, pride, insecurity and complexities!
Where do I even begin to tell the story of how deep a love can be, how it transcends time, place and people. Perhaps this is a story about how women are their own worst enemies. Either way it is a story that tells us how frail, fragile and fraught we are as humans and how much we hurt each other.
This love story began when I was two years old. Growing up in India in a culture that wove love stories like Laila Majnu, Heer Ranjha and the epic symbol of love, the Taj Mahal, into the very fabric of our existence, love was always an integral part of our lives.
One such love story was of a boy and a girl who were neighbours. The boy, an athlete, artist and a poet, found his muse in this shy, thoughtful and in her own way poetic girl, who seemed to worship the very ground he walked on. Her face could be found in all the paintings he created, and her name in every poem he wrote. The girl called him Sagar, which means ocean, symbolizing his all-encompassing love for her.
Everything thing was going well; their wedding date was being finalized, till the boy’s older brother who was a doctor in the same little town, got accepted into Stanford Medical School to do his MS.
Earlier my husband would say, 'Arey! What is there in making dal-roti? It's so simple.' After he had to cook everyday when I was ill, he has stopped saying that to me!
“Arey! What is there to do in making dal roti? Put a handful of lentils in the cooker and let it whistle and make two rotis. After all, how long will it take?” A handful of dal (lentils) and two rotis! This is the story of every woman and no one seems to understand.
Some time ago, after a shopping spree, my husband and I entered the house, exhausted. I had just about kept all the bags aside, when my husband said, “I am very hungry, can you make something.”
I looked at my husband in amazement and thought, ‘He had just had food, how did he get hungry again so soon?’
My husband, as if he had read my face, said, “Arey! You know that my stomach is not filled with outside food. Just make dal roti. What is there to do in making dal roti? Put a handful of lentils in the cooker and let it whistle and make two rotis. After all, how long will it take?”
‘Is this the way dal (lentils) and roti are made?’ The thought came to my mind. ‘After all, I also went along and now I am tired too.’ I was also getting angry at myself that after all, I had spoiled the habit of everyone in the house.
"Why you have reduced your identity to being wife –daughter of somebody? That’s not your only identity. You are gifted, you need to be known, appreciated liked or criticized for your own qualities and work."
“Why you have reduced your identity to being wife –daughter of somebody? That’s not your only identity. You are gifted, you need to be known, appreciated liked or criticized for your own qualities and work.”
“So you are the one??”
“Is that a question or statement that you made?”
“JUST A STATEMENT ….”
A 'sexual' scene from the movie The Wedding Guest, which features Dev Patel and Radhika Apte has been leaked, and shared with only Radhika Apte’s name attached to it. A reminder that shame is attached only to female sexuality?
A ‘sexual’ scene from the movie The Wedding Guest, which features Dev Patel and Radhika Apte has been leaked, and shared with only Radhika Apte’s name attached to it. A reminder that shame is attached only to female sexuality?
For a good actor, acting is an art, and not just work. Tastefully filmed nude scenes or intimate scenes are also art. But in a country like India, where sex and sexuality are considered taboo, even the most artfully filmed scenes are treated like cheap pornography.
A case in point is a scene from the movie The Wedding Guest, which features Dev Patel and Radhika Apte engaging in intimate sexual acts. The scene, which leaked online a few days ago, has gone viral.
Speaking about the scene, Radhika Apte said, “The leaked sex scene featured both Radhika Apte and Dev Patel in it. But the scenes are being spread in my name. Why the people are not getting spread (sic) under the male actor Dev Patel’s name?”