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Are you happy? Being associated with beautiful things make you happy or happiness is a state of mind? Read on to find out!
Yes, association with beautiful things and people make us happy. Being associated with the holiday spirit and retail therapy makes us more than happy. People who agree with us and chill with us make us happy. But realistically speaking, are all these things and many others listed here, making us actually happy? I would rather call them mood boosters.
If there are mood boosters, obviously the converse is also true. There are mood downers as well. We are meandering in between the valleys and hills of our emotional life. In one day itself, we fluctuate between a myriad of emotions. But what is the predominant life tendency?
Happiness is not tangible unlike food and sex which can be physically enjoyed. It´s hard to measure it. It also varies as per people´s perception. And the fact is people who are happy will view all events rather positively, unlike others who will sulk and be suspicious even owing to the smallest provocations. I have heard people using the words: ‘Born happy’. What does that mean? Is it a DNA setting which predisposes us to being largely happy or unhappy?
I don´t know. This topic has been researched and no hard and fast rules have been set or any foolproof formulae discovered for instant and constant happiness. I have also tried many permutations and combinations of love, meditation, action, holidays, family and friends to see what really makes me happy. I have succumbed many a times to the ‘Happiness by Association’ concept. The temporary sense of elation dissipates as soon as the association fades in importance and priorities change. And then I realized over a period of time, that this whole pursuit of happiness is overrated.
Happiness is simply the joy of being in the present moment completely. It is to feel connected to the people in our environment at that moment. Being physically in the same room with family or friends but head and heart being elsewhere is a total antithesis to happiness. This constant divide can lead to huge anxieties and is the root cause of various health issues. Anyone at cross purposes with self cannot be happy. If that is the case, then it also manifests in the immediate environment, i.e. of family, workplace. There has to be a unity of head and heart, a unity of purpose and action, to be happy and live harmoniously vis-à-vis our world.
I think happiness happens when we’re not “trying” so hard, when we accept this moment as the entire moment of being alive. Happiness happens when we’re not totally obsessed with “being happy” but rather able to do our best in each moment, feeling alive and creating value very naturally. Each moment becomes important and well lived. Life is a collection of these beautiful moments.
I feel the happiest when I am able to live with an open heart, love my dog, and have a sense of kinship with my maid and my colleagues alike. Just sitting by myself, a small snippet makes me smile or a piece of music fills my heart with sheer magical joy. Happiness lies in accepting the today, here and now in its entirety. When I feel a part of this whole universe and it envelopes me in its sheer magic, I am happy and in unison with my world and not just happy by association.
Image Source: Pexels
Bindiya is a linguist and works for a diplomatic mission in New Delhi. She is a published author, reluctant poet, passionate bibliotherapist and a happiness harbinger. Her heart beats in her community-building volunteer organization - “ read more...
This post has published with none or minimal editorial intervention. Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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