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Are you happy? Being associated with beautiful things make you happy or happiness is a state of mind? Read on to find out!
Yes, association with beautiful things and people make us happy. Being associated with the holiday spirit and retail therapy makes us more than happy. People who agree with us and chill with us make us happy. But realistically speaking, are all these things and many others listed here, making us actually happy? I would rather call them mood boosters.
If there are mood boosters, obviously the converse is also true. There are mood downers as well. We are meandering in between the valleys and hills of our emotional life. In one day itself, we fluctuate between a myriad of emotions. But what is the predominant life tendency?
Happiness is not tangible unlike food and sex which can be physically enjoyed. It´s hard to measure it. It also varies as per people´s perception. And the fact is people who are happy will view all events rather positively, unlike others who will sulk and be suspicious even owing to the smallest provocations. I have heard people using the words: ‘Born happy’. What does that mean? Is it a DNA setting which predisposes us to being largely happy or unhappy?
I don´t know. This topic has been researched and no hard and fast rules have been set or any foolproof formulae discovered for instant and constant happiness. I have also tried many permutations and combinations of love, meditation, action, holidays, family and friends to see what really makes me happy. I have succumbed many a times to the ‘Happiness by Association’ concept. The temporary sense of elation dissipates as soon as the association fades in importance and priorities change. And then I realized over a period of time, that this whole pursuit of happiness is overrated.
Happiness is simply the joy of being in the present moment completely. It is to feel connected to the people in our environment at that moment. Being physically in the same room with family or friends but head and heart being elsewhere is a total antithesis to happiness. This constant divide can lead to huge anxieties and is the root cause of various health issues. Anyone at cross purposes with self cannot be happy. If that is the case, then it also manifests in the immediate environment, i.e. of family, workplace. There has to be a unity of head and heart, a unity of purpose and action, to be happy and live harmoniously vis-à-vis our world.
I think happiness happens when we’re not “trying” so hard, when we accept this moment as the entire moment of being alive. Happiness happens when we’re not totally obsessed with “being happy” but rather able to do our best in each moment, feeling alive and creating value very naturally. Each moment becomes important and well lived. Life is a collection of these beautiful moments.
I feel the happiest when I am able to live with an open heart, love my dog, and have a sense of kinship with my maid and my colleagues alike. Just sitting by myself, a small snippet makes me smile or a piece of music fills my heart with sheer magical joy. Happiness lies in accepting the today, here and now in its entirety. When I feel a part of this whole universe and it envelopes me in its sheer magic, I am happy and in unison with my world and not just happy by association.
Image Source: Pexels
Bindiya is a linguist, who works at a diplomatic mission, is a wife, a mother, and an Indian citizen who is passionate about living life to its fullest. She is actively involved in several social read more...
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
As long as teachers are competent in their job, and adhere to the workplace code of conduct, how does it matter what they do in their personal lives?
A 30 year old Associate Professor at a well-known University, according to an FIR filed by her, was forced to resign because the father of one of her students complained that he found his son looking at photographs of her, which according to him were “objectionable” and “bordering on nudity”.
There are two aspects to this case, which are equally disturbing, and which together make me question where we are heading as a society.
When the father of an 18 year old finds his son looking at photographs of a lady in a swimsuit, he can do many things. What this parent allegedly did was to dash off a letter to the University which states: