I Can Truly LIVE My Life Now ‘Coz My Husband Supported Me In The Darkest Phase Of It

Posted: November 11, 2018

Depression can be a very tricky beast, draining the life and soul out of you, and sometimes those who seem the happiest might be the most at danger. Talk to someone today.

“It is easy to slide into depression fueled by the pointlessness of existence.”

When was the last time you spoke to somebody with all your heart?

I just did my first job interview in five years and I didn’t get the job. I am very talkative, assertive and positive but I still couldn’t make it. Is it because I have lost touch with my communication skills? Or is it because I have lost confidence in myself? Or is it just that I was too scared to speak up?

Whatever the reason, I realized that I had not talked to somebody honestly for a while now. It has been a few years since my dad passed away, and the last time I only remember speaking to him about what I want to be and who I want to become. I wanted to be like him, I wanted to speak with the ease that he spoke with, I wanted to look the way he looked, radiant and elegant.

Now, see, there is a difference between wanting to be someone and being that someone. I want to be like him, but I don’t know how, and he is not here to guide me.

In life, you always need somebody to push you that extra mile and make you do the right thing. That somebody for me was Dad. It is true that we don’t realize the value of things and the people who are with us. Their true value is realized only when they are lost. I did not understand the reason for my sadness, and certainly did not understand the impact his loss had on me. I became quiet all of a sudden, I could not cry, I could not focus, I started binge-eating, I grew fat. All these are the consequences of the loss of a loved one. Without even trying to dig through the reasons for these changes, I accepted them. I started to live with them.

Until someone else pointed out to me that there have been such drastic changes in my lifestyle I had been ignorant. And that someone is my husband. He has been in my life as a friend, a teacher and a well-wisher. He observed the way I was giving up on life and helped me put myself and my life back together before it tore apart. He helped me understand I was depressed and brought me back to life with all his heart.

Not many people know this part of my life but I have no shame in reiterating it. In life, we need help, to stop our life from tearing apart, to keep ourselves healthy, wealthy and wise. Now I make informed decisions about diet, money, career, and everything else. I do what I want to do without hurting myself or my dear ones. We all need someone to support our decisions and catch us when we fall and pick us up again to fight another day.

Yes, we need to talk about depression and all other mental health related issues before it is too late. We need to talk about what is stopping us from doing what we want, to that someone we can trust. It is always necessary to have someone to watch our backs while we move forward leaving behind the life that hurt us.

There is a taboo attached to the fact that we all suffer from setbacks in life, and the capabilities of each individual to cope with the situation are different. I talked about it and you also need to before it is too late. I have lost quite a few people to depression and to my shock they were a few of the happiest people I knew. It should not be mistaken that happy people do not suffer; in fact, they suffer the most and are most of the time unable to express their concern.

Hoping that somewhere, someday, someone may remember these words and not destroy their lives in the spur of a moment and think of those who love them and those that they love.

It is never too late to talk to someone, GO, NOW.

A version of this was first published here.

Image source: unsplash

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