If you want to understand how to become better allies to people with disabilities, then join us at Embracing All Abilities: Including People with Disabilities at Work.
The recent murder of Shailza Dwivedi which made newspaper headlines is a gruesome example of 'love' turning into obsession. This is not the first time an innocent life was lost because a woman spurred a man's unwanted advances.
The recent murder of Shailza Dwivedi which made newspaper headlines is a gruesome example of ‘love’ turning into obsession. This is not the first time an innocent life was lost because a woman spurred a man’s unwanted advances.
As per the reports, Shailza met her alleged killer Major Handa on a social networking site and became friendly with him. He however fell in love with her and pursued her relentlessly. Shailza was married and not interested in furthering their relationship which angered him.
On that fateful day he called her for a meeting and proposed marriage to her. When she refused, he slit her throat in a fit of rage and then ran his car over her to show the murder as an accident.
The only mistake if any that Shailza made was not recognising his obsessive traits in the very beginning and she paid for it with her life. This is not the first time an innocent life was lost because a woman spurred a man’s unwanted advances and it will certainly not be the last.
Jealousy and possessiveness are dangerous emotions and if not checked, can become ugly. In the beginning of a relationship, they are seen as natural and even adorable. The true risks of these emotions come ahead later.
These traits are usually displayed by men who are insecure and are unable to take ‘no’ for an answer. They believe that if a woman has shown the slightest interest in the beginning or has been polite and friendly then she is leading him on. If she backs out later, then she is only playing ‘hard to get’. The fact that she may not be interested or may have changed her mind is preposterous to them and they believe that she should pay for ‘wronging them’.
There are many signs that can help you understand if you are heading into an abusive relationship which may become hazardous:
The best way to deal with such a situation is to end this ‘friendship’ at the earliest. It’s also ideal to not agree to meet this person alone or at lonely places. People with such behavioural traits ad a sense of entitlement are prone to fits of rage and may commit unpredictable, rash acts.
In a relationship, at any point of time, both the partners have a right to change their minds and move on. If one of the partners is obsessed and shows threatening behaviour at such a suggestion then it’s time to involve outside people, like family members for your own safety. If it helps then one should even involve the law enforcement for complete safety, although it has to be said that the response of police in India to such complaints is often not helpful.
Do not take obsessive behaviour lightly – more often than not it has proved to be fatal.
Image via vecteezy.com
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views. Individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times. If you have a complementary or differing point of view, sign up and start sharing your views too!
My first book - Second Chances has just released and is present on all online book stores. Do pick up a copy to read about the adventures of a novice ghost. read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
As parents, we put a piece of our hearts out into this world and into the custody of the teachers at school and tuition and can only hope and pray that they treat them well.
Trigger Warning: This speaks of physical and emotional violence by teachers, caste based abuse, and contains some graphic details, and may be triggering for survivors.
When I was in Grade 10, I flunked my first preliminary examination in Mathematics. My mother was in a panic. An aunt recommended the Maths classes conducted by the Maths sir she knew personally. It was a much sought-after class, one of those classes that you signed up for when you were in the ninth grade itself back then, all those decades ago. My aunt kindly requested him to take me on in the middle of the term, despite my marks in the subject, and he did so as a favour.
Math had always been a nightmare. In retrospect, I wonder why I was always so terrified of math. I’ve concluded it is because I am a head in the cloud person and the rigor of the step by step process in math made me lose track of what needed to be done before I was halfway through. In today’s world, I would have most probably been diagnosed as attention deficit. Back then we had no such definitions, no such categorisations. Back then we were just bright sparks or dim.
Pathaan touted as SRK’s comeback has been in the news for mixed reasons. Right from the hype around SRK’s comeback and special mentions his body contours; yet I can't watch it!
The movie touted as SRK’s comeback has been in the news for mixed reasons. Right from the hype around the movie being SRK’s comeback and special mentions his body contours and even more than the female lead!
For me, it’s not about Deepika’s bikini colour or was-it-needed skin show. It’s about meaningful content that I find is missing big time. Not just this movie, but a spate of cringe-worthy narratives passed off as ‘movies’ in the recent past. I feel insulted, and not because I am a devoutly religious person or a hardcore feminist, but because I feel the content insults my intelligence.
But before everything else, I am a 90s kid who in the case of movies (and maybe more) is stuck in time as it wrapped around me then and the gamut has too hard an exterior for me to crack it open!
Please enter your email address