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The fight against depression often ends up being a lone war, because even well-meaning people may not care enough. If you had a friend with mental health issues, how would you help?
I am sick. I am not stupid, or disabled. I am not crazy. It’s not just stress. It’s not in my head. I am not causing it myself. I am not making it up. I am learning about it and about myself every day. I try my best to deal with the pain. I can still do things for myself. I have managed to make something of myself. I can look after myself. I like that I am independent. But sometimes, I may need your help.
It would mean a ton if you did not take it as my flaw. I am not giving up. For every time I said I can’t take it anymore, I am still here. But sometimes, I forget that I am not weak.
Don’t you need that little boost from time to time? I need it more often than you. Don’t some people get the flu more often than others? I am not weak. It must be my mental immune system.
Don’t you need that little boost from time to time? I need it more often than you.
Sometimes I need your help. Lend a hand. You don’t know how much it could mean.
For those of us who ask for help, we meet 3 kinds of well-meaning people. There’s absolutely no doubting the fact that all three care, and want to help. They are:
Then there are the ones who leave. After all, it is advisable to cut out those people who sap you off your energy and affect your zeal. Sometimes I wonder if it’s just the mentally ill one should cut out or are they referring to the terminally ill as well?
If one thinks judiciously, the quote “People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime” does not hugely apply to those with a weak mental immune system. People come into our lives mostly for a season.
Lastly, there are the ones who think that nothing is wrong with you. On some level, I believe that these people are good for us. They may not be the ‘go-to’ people, but they will treat you like any other friend. No patronising, no judgment. In any case the ‘go-to’ people should always be the professionals.
One did not realise the need (or lack) of a support system till a therapist pointed it out. The exact words were ‘there are plans/activities we can work on, but they work best when we involve more people who can be a part of the journey.’ God Bless the husbands, parents/siblings, or just about anyone who commits.
It’s not right to expect a friend to commit to something like this. But I am forever grateful to the friends who have, at some point or another, ‘heard me out’ and done what they could.
It’s not right to expect a friend to commit to something like this. But I am forever grateful to the friends who have, at some point or another, ‘heard me out’ and done what they could. And to this one friend who has stuck. Or have I stuck to him like a leech? They say real friends are the ones who have done something for you that you can never pay back for.
Thank you. I can never pay you back.
Pic credit: Image of a depressed woman via Shutterstock.
The power of stories to inspire change made me turn into a storyteller. I write on 2 topics that need a very clear shift in attitude – ‘Being single in India’ & ‘Stigma attached to mental read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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