Over the years, your support has made Women’s Web the leading resource for women in India. Now, it is our turn to ask, how can we make this even more useful for you? Please take our short 5 minute questionnaire – your feedback is important to us!
Parents pass on their dreams and expectations to their children, not realizing the toll it takes on them - stress, health issues, and even depression.
Parents pass on their dreams and expectations to their children, not realizing the toll it takes on them – stress, health issues, and even depression. What are your children inheriting?
Someone I know is battling depression.
Because of her MBBS examinations. She has no interest in the study of the human body. Why, she even pukes at the sight of blood. But, she had to take up MBBS after her 12th in spite of scoring a free seat in Engineering. It was her father’s dream to become a doctor but he couldn’t fulfill it. So he had pinned all his hopes on his daughter who is now frequenting doctors to get over her frustrations.
Ambitions are personal to everyone and they change with time. Expecting your children to achieve your ambition is like asking them to look for a treasure that you missed out on. Parents might think that they are doing the right thing by instilling high goals in their children. But the burden of turning the dream into a reality, for the sake of their parents, takes a big toll on them. Parents never confront their own failures; instead they hope that their child shall achieve success for them.
Every parent loves their child. Every parent wants to see their child rise above the rest. But that doesn’t mean that they vicariously live their dreams through their child. Especially, when the interests of the child lie elsewhere. The child is pressurized into something he/she doesn’t want to do and does poorly in them. This upsets the parents and they punish the child more, without actually realizing who is at fault here.
Expecting your children to achieve your ambition is like asking them to look for a treasure that you missed out on.
Some parents fail to see their children as separate individuals with hopes and dreams of their own. These parents push their dead dreams on them and expect pride and fulfillment in return. Some parents get their dreams fulfilled, others are left disappointed. Children desperately try to develop an interest in their parent’s dream just to please them. And to feel wanted. The children who fail to live their parent’s dream take extreme measures to escape the rejection. The same parents sit and mope later.
This issue is very insidious and more often than not, parents do not realize what they are doing. This places undue pressure on the growing minds of children which later leads to anger, frustration, mental illness, and depression. All this, just because the parent chose to live in denial.
Understand your children. Understand their dreams, and help them live it. Your child achieving something that you couldn’t is not a consolation. It means that a valid dream is buried while they were busy building yours. They may or may not curse you later. But deep within themselves, there remains anger and frustration. Which they will pass on to their children.
Pic Credit: Harold Groven (Used under a CC license)
A bibliophile with a quest for writing, I'm a techie by day. An eternal optimist and a feminist, I believe that once we achieve equality, we can achieve anything in this world. I firmly read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Relatives kissing children's penises made me wonder how this is leaving boys vulnerable to potential abuse under the garb of affection.
As we witness in all Indian family gatherings – whether a wedding, a birthday, or a summer vacation – nostalgia soaks us all.
However, one such gathering exposed me to a horrific practice that, though common in many houses worldwide, is very problematic.
It all started with my horror at hearing one of the supposedly funny anecdotes about my cousin’s birth.
These women investors are figuring out exactly what they want, breaking stereotypes and being their best selves in the midst!
While there is a generalised view of investors being men in suits, and it is true that the investing space holds too few women still, there is hope! In Indian market, women are emerging as investors in all capacities and at all scales, whether as part of large VC firms, boutique investment firms, private equity ventures or as angel investors.
Being an investor is certainly not a man’s domain alone. Several women investors have inspired people to opt for this emerging career. These women break the glass ceiling and defy stereotypes as they rise above the bar.
While the venture capitalist and investment industry on the whole are becoming more cognisant of funding more women entrepreneurs and closing the gender gap, when it comes to startups, true equality is still a distant dream. So, the rise of women investors should certainly bring more hope to women entrepreneurs looking for funding.