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Failure is never a loss, but an opportunity to learn. It is high time that we understood this and helped our kids grasp the idea too! Read here!
So the other day, amongst all randomness, one thing that got me thinking was LOSS or FAILURE (Yes! That despicable word!! I wonder who put that in the dictionary!?) And how it has plagued our children and their thinking!
The only purpose that this word can ever serve is to demean or belittle someone.
And well, we have used it incessantly, at one point of time or the other, for ourselves or someone else… and intentionally or unintentionally labelled a win or a loss!
But between those blacks and whites of wins and losses was a grey area that never got attention. Probably because we were never taught to look at one! Between the white of win and the black of loss, is the area of learning!
So what if you did not get through that exam or your marks did not reach ‘your mark’? Does it end your world!? Is there nothing useful that comes out of it!?
With the rising number of suicides and the recent case of murders in schools ( I hope you heard about the kid who murdered a fellow student to avert exams or that hot-headed teenager who shot his principal), I feel we have a serious-serious need to help our children explore this unventured zone!
Let them be confident in their own skin! Comparisons can be lethal! So it is best to help a child explore their strengths and bring the best out of them! (We can’t teach a fish to fly..no matter how hard we try!)
Teenagers are caught up in a struggle between childhood and the life beyond! Speak to them! Support their decisions, even when they fail! A casual ‘I told you so’ will help but trying to control their lives is not the best idea!! (So you might know what’s best for them, but remember, you have the responsibility of bringing up a future adult, well equipped with making their own decisions!)
The bounce back is always more crucial than the set back(-Hadiiya Barbel). It is not the fall that is important but the time after that. So how a child copes up with it and learns to get back on track is what makes the real difference. Be their guiding light!
Be friends with them but let them have their own circle! I have met mothers who take pride in the fact that they are their children’s best friends!!
I feel sorry for such kids because they are missing out on such wonderful experiences that friendship has to offer. They are missing out on learning virtues like loyalty, trust, patience, tolerance, prudence and justice.
So remember…it is as important to experience dejection, as a triumph! The only thing being consistent with either is PROGRESSION!
Published here earlier.
Image source: pixabay