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I don't think there is anything wrong with my husband and I expressing love freely and within boundaries in front of our kids. Do you?
I don’t think there is anything wrong with my husband and I expressing love freely and within boundaries in front of our kids. Do you?
I plant a peck on his lips, circle my arms around his belly, ruffle his balding hair and tell him how much I love him. He responds as he does every morning with a kiss on my neck and launches us into discussing lunch options.
Meanwhile, our eight-year-old observes us, averts his eyes, smiles and goes back to slurping cereal. Our resolution to ensure expressing love in our children’s company (while keeping it within physical boundaries suitable for their age) has infused an enchanting, joyful environment at home.
However, our conservative extended families, with the excuse of “culture” challenge our efforts to maintain such an atmosphere. Thanks to our nuclear family of four, I am not compelled to tolerate their displeasures for too long. Nevertheless, my vehement, uncompromising opposition of their antiquated perspectives has earned me adversaries who have structurally alienated us.
These are women who believe it is appropriate to argue in front of their children, and men who do not hesitate to harm their spouses in front of the youngsters. Yet, devoid of all shame, they celebrate anniversaries, share snappy photos on social media for display. The obstinate sanctimony and fakery are okay for young minds, but not body language that says – I love you?
These are couples who devolved into enforcing a social order of women dutifully cooking while men debate politics pretending expertise. They are adults harbouring intuitions that normalise suppression of girls through imposing categorical, discriminating lifestyles.
These are creatures who are fearless to condemn my choice to kiss my husband in public because that is not an example a woman should set in society. Yet, they cower under the glares of faulty husbands and in-laws.
Thank you for banning me. I detest your ‘ideologies’, your dominant influence on young souls you are unfortunately responsible for and your bigotry lacking limits.
Every time, I shall oppose every being of your kind. And I shall preach that parents showing love towards each other are one of the critical aspects resulting in happier childhoods and joyfully balanced children. These youngsters will grow up to cherish their parents as adults whom they can approach to discuss their budding romances, feelings and emotions.
Next time, despite the crowd, if you feel like it – express love. Your children will notice and reciprocate with positivity.
Picture credits: Still from Bollywood movie Sky Is Pink
I studied Religion & Conflict at Harvard University. I am a freelance, mostly uncharted journalist, with roots in the London School of Journalism. I grew up within a multi-cultural, inter-continental tapestry of race variations, read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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