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Steeped in deep conditioning many women sacrifice their dreams & self-care. This leads to physical & mental exhaustion, regret of dashed dreams & loss of her unique identity.
As care-givers, many women slip into acts that sustain and provide for her family, friends, and colleagues at work. When her husband burns the midnight oil preparing for a critical presentation, the cup of hot chocolate arrives without asking.
She drops her work to patiently listen to the unending woes of a colleague struggling with a micromanaging boss. Locating the missing sock in a pile of clothes, fixing a loose button on the shirt, ensuring the maids maintain an orderly kitchen, be the first to compromise when there are conflicting demands- she is the glue that keeps the family together.
At work, she is quick to detect a change in tone of voice as an indication of hurt or joy. She’s adept at building consensus among her team when perspectives differ widely.
Even though these acts of service consume her time, energy, and mind space they are not something that can be showcased or measured in any way. A young mother complained, “My day is busy, and I get tired by the end of it. But then I wonder if I’ve really achieved anything?” These are invaluable acts that stitch together the fabric of harmony, stability, and order in a unit.
Steeped in deep conditioning that others are more important than her, sacrifice at the cost of self-care becomes her driving force. While there is no denying that many women revel in being the psychological anchor for family and teams; there are costs to it as well. In the fulfilment of her worldly duties, nourishment for her inner-self runs dry.
Over a period, there is physical and mental exhaustion, the regret of dashed dreams and the loss of her unique identity.
To further exacerbate her predicament, is the fact that she rarely gets acknowledged or appreciated by others. In a world where the patriarchal mindset is still pervasive, these qualities are a tacit expectation of a woman. Not one to blow her trumpet, she expectantly awaits a gesture of gratitude and encouragement. Even the slightest note rewards her amply as she finds renewed energy to keep going. However, for many women, these gestures are few and far between.
A woman’s power lies in finding the balance between holding her core and caring for others around her. A few self-protection and self-preservation steps that she needs to adopt to sustain her vitality:
For far too long, women have stayed in the background as compassionate care-givers but silent sufferers.
It’s time to step out, take centre-stage, to nourish her soul and celebrate her uniqueness!
Image source: Still from Ki and Ka
Aparna is a leadership coach and facilitator with over 25 years of cross-functional work experience. She brings with her diverse experience of sales, consulting and facilitation of personal transformation. She has worked with organizations read more...
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Dear Women’s Web Community Member,
You may have wondered at our being on the quieter side during the last couple of months. Thank you for your patience, and we wanted to come back to you with a detailed note on what’s been happening at our end of things.
When we first began Women’s Web, as a blog from one woman’s desk along with a few like-minded souls, little could we have imagined the heights that it would soar to. Over the years, Women’s Web has published over 20000 stories (almost all by women), empowered countless women with the ideas, community and resources to chase their dreams, employed hundreds of women in core and project-based roles, and in the process, emerged as the OG women’s community in India. It has also inspired many others to build communities of a similar nature, all enabling women (and other-underrepresented groups) in their own ways.
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