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Influencer and celebrity YouTuber Dolly Singh recently posted a video of herself as Preeti from Kabir Singh, changing the meek Preeti into someone quote badass.
The key feature of Kabir Singh is its blatant male toxicity and violence rather than the love of the protagonist. Dolly Singh has yet again reminded us of its existence.
On her Instagram account, she posted a video of herself with a very vibrant, strong, and different Preeti.
Well, A young woman who falls in love with a very possessive, controlling, and violent man. Kabir Singh. Preeti is not just the female lead opposite Kabir Singh, but an unfortunate example of how a woman accepts violence and manipulation in love.
Preeti meekly takes the slap Kabir Singh gives her, setting up a problematic role model for young women in love, and for young men who feel it’s ok to be controlling and violent towards a woman they love, since after all, what else can he do in the heat of the moment?
Preeti might have tolerated “just a slap” but Thappad’s Amrita Sabharwal let us all know that “just a slap, lekin nahi mar sakta!” (He can’t hit me!).
YouTuber Dolly Singh, famous for her strong voice, has uploaded this reel on her Instagram account, which has gone viral. Her caption states “Ye Preeti thodi alag hai” (This Preeti is different). Well, indeed!
Dolly Singh is dressed up here exactly like Preeti in the movie, and has nailed the badass version of the character with her own scripted dialogues. The love she has for Kabir didn’t overshadow her regard for her own dignity and respect. Love for Kabir doesn’t make her forget her father’s love. She also doesn’t wait for Kabir’s stupid “6-hour challenge”, but instead announces that she would file a lawsuit against him for the slap.
In her closing statement she says that “Love makes us accept chocolates and ice-creams, not a slap.”
Love is something that should make a person’s life richer in terms of companionship and happiness. The love that deliberately leaves us traumatized cannot be termed as “Love”. While the movie did not portray that Preeti was traumatized by her abusive boyfriend, it portrayed her family as the ‘negative’ force in her life. Preeti might not have realized it, but we all do.
It was interesting to see how Dolly Singh brought out the change in Preeti that I was looking for as an audience. There was something satisfying watching Preeti fight for herself, instead of accepting herself as just ‘Kabir’s girlfriend’ who can be pushed around at his will. It felt like the kind of change every Indian woman needs in her relationships.
Many pretty-Preetis fall in love with kachra-Kabirs but in the end, it is also Preeti’s responsibility to stand up for herself and let Kabir know that he belongs to trash. Dolly turned around the character from “just a pretty girl” to “I matter too”.
Even in anger, even in an argument, even when making legitimate mistakes, violence is not justified. Everything isn’t fair in love and war every time. Violence is not fair in love. Manipulation is not fair in love. Abusing a woman’s father is not fair in love.
Preeti chooses to destroy herself in love, but Dolly Singh’s Preeti had other choices too. Her voice raised when Kabir threatened to slap her, she admitted openly that she had fallen in love with a cheap person, she protested when her father was criticized harshly, and she was not quiet after being slapped.
There is a quote by Elif Shafak that says, “If we are the same person before and after we loved, that means we haven’t loved enough.”
Love has the power to change us all. But the real Preeti stayed the same; she continued to be a sweet, shy, and silent girl, who meekly accepted all kinds of nonsense. Let’s say she didn’t love enough. She did not actually fall for the guy who randomly came and kissed her cheek without her consent. Dolly’s reel version of Preeti loved enough and turned into a strong woman when she saw signs of toxicity. She spoke up for her own dignity, making Kabir Singh realise that he cannot get away with his aggression. She loved enough, but sometimes love is not as we had desired; respect is also vital.
May we have many more such Preetis.
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Bhumika is an English Majors undergraduate at the University Of Delhi and at this moment actively working with an NGO, as a content department associate that works for normalizing menstruation and promotes menstrual hygiene. She read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
At one point, she confesses to her mother that the beatings are no longer physical, they have started affecting her mentally as well, and she wants to break free of this cycle of abuse.
Trigger Warning: This deals with domestic violence and may be triggering for survivors.
I recently watched Darlings on Netflix. It’s a quirky, dark satire featuring the dynamite duo of Alia Bhatt and Shefali Shah. The movie depicts domestic violence and the psychology of abuse.
Even though the subject matter is dark, there are light moments and humour, which make it immensely watchable. It stands out for its powerhouse performances and unique storyline.