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I don’t want to lie down and stare at the ceiling, neither do I want to get out of bed. There is a feeling of utter hopelessness engulfing me.
It’s a Monday morning. But does it really matter what day of the week it is. I seem to have lost all semblance of day, date and time. Thank God for the sunrise and sunset, else differentiating between day and night would have proven to be yet another challenge!
I don’t want to lie down and stare at the ceiling, neither do I want to get out of bed. There is a feeling of utter hopelessness engulfing me. As an adult, I can understand the necessity of being locked down, but how do I explain the gravity to my young children. Children who want to run in the grass without a facemask, meet their friends for a birthday party, burst the khoi bag and gather around for the little trinkets.. How do I empower them with positivity and happiness when slowly, inside my own self, I am only looking at despair and disheartens.
As the country slowly proceeds towards unlocking restaurants and malls, how do I answer the young curious minds that ask – “Why can’t schools open if shops can? Are we not the future of the country? Safety is important but if a gradual unlock is happening across the states, shouldn’t schools be given priority?”
People at every age need their own company. To ensure that my kids have a safe and comfortable childhood, I am one of the many moms that give up on luncheons and high tea parties. I am busy swimming with them or taking them up the mountains. We play a lot, indulge in YouTube cooking videos and managed to keep ourselves busy and occupied for months on end. But everything gets to a stagnation point.
I am craving my own life, where I can wake up one morning and not worry about the breakfast menu or the activity of the day, without a gadget of course. I want to wake up to absolutely no responsibility or duty. Maybe I want to have a frozen margherita in the afternoon sun, or laze in the hammock as the breeze wafts by. I turn to my side and sit up as I stretch my arms up high and attempt a soft smile – Thank you for a beautiful day! The ritual of the day has begun.
I have to keep walking for the light at the end of the tunnel does appear eventually. I’m responsible, I remind myself, for two other lives. And no matter how draining it may seem, I don’t have the liberty of taking the day off. It will come, eventually. But for today.. once again, I wipe the tears of loneliness, kiss the garlanded picture on my bedside table and force a smile – for someone else.
Is it Monday… or is it mun-dane!
Image source: whoismargot on pixabay
Pooja Poddar Marwah is an Indian author and blogger. (October 22,1978) Her foray into writing began in a parking lot, whilst she was waiting for her kids’ co-curriculars to get over. Her debut read more...
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
Darlings makes some excellent points about domestic violence . For such a movie to not follow through with a resolution that won't be problematic, is disappointing.
I watched Darlings last weekend, staying on top of its release on Netflix. It was a long-awaited respite from the recent flicks. I wanted badly to jump into its praise and will praise it, for something has to be said for the powerhouse performances it is packed with. But I will not be able to in a way that I really had wanted to.
I wanted to say that this is a must-watch on domestic violence that I stand behind and a needed and nuanced social portrayal. But unfortunately, I can’t. For I found Darlings to be deeply problematic when it comes to the portrayal of domestic violence and how that should be dealt with.
Before we rush to the ‘you must be having a problem because a man was hit’ or ‘much worse happens to women’ conclusions, that is not what my issue is. I have seen the praises and criticisms, and the criticisms of criticisms. I know, from having had close associations with non-profits and activists who fight domestic violence not just in India but globally, that much worse happens to women. I have written a book with case studies and statistics on that. Neither do I have any moral qualms around violence getting tackled with violence (that will be another post some day).