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Female orgasms are a mystery to many (including women) but they definitely do not need to be. Here are 7 myths we’ve demystified for you!
From assumptions that “women don’t really need sex” to beliefs that “women shouldn’t care so much about pleasure” – there are a host of myths when it comes to women and their sexuality.
And as for female orgasms, what’s that, say many…
In this piece, I try and bust many of these myths about female orgasms. If many women find them elusive, chances are it’s because we have all been conditioned to consider women’s sexual pleasure as immaterial.
This piece is part of a series called #PleasureMatters. Stay tuned for more such posts on women’s sexual pleasure.
Pic credit: https://twitter.com/reactionvideos_/status/1114546051661406209
False!
In fact, the clitoris is the only organ (across male and female human bodies) that solely exists for sexual pleasure.
However, according to a popular Durex ad, 70% of Indian women do not orgasm during intercourse. Well, many women never never experiencing one does not mean a woman is biologically incapable of orgasms.
Pic credit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pG5gFcBqj7I
Nope!
Using vibrators won’t ‘desensitise’ your vagina to pleasure although what can happen is that other forms of stimulation may pale in comparison.
Speaking of the clitoris, we only see a bit of the clitoris – the little button. The entire structure (about 10 cms) is hidden underneath.
Kinda not true !
While women can orgasm through a myriad of ways, penetrative sex is usually not enough for most women to orgasm. Some form of clitoral stimulation, especially during foreplay, really helps. Talk to your partner to communicate your own desires and needs.
Pic credit: https://twitter.com/jackieaina/status/1120778000952225792?s=20
Totally, completely and utterly FALSE.
Condoms not only help in preventing the spread of diseases, and reduce worries about unwanted pregnancy, but can also make sex more pleasurable, with added features like lube or ribbing.
We suggest using condoms even when sharing sex toys!
Not true!
Sex is not just for one person (and not just between a man and a woman). A good sexual experience means everyone gets their pleasure (whatever that may mean for the individual). Partners should definitely communicate with each other about what they want.
Definitely a myth!
Research has found that women have the g-spot, but may respond to stimulation differently; like with most sexual experiences, it needs to be discovered and learnt.
SO NOT TRUE!
In many societies, it is considered that women need to have sex only to get pregnant. Pleasurable sex is only for men apparently. However, women have desires and do have sex for the pleasure it can bring.
Unfortunately, such myths and the dominance of men in the world of sex means women often never experience orgasms or even fake them for the satisfaction of their partner.
Further, our societies are steeped with heteronormative ideas about sex when, in fact, sex is diverse, complex and preferences vary. Everyone deserves to experience pleasure – the time has come for women to own their sexuality.
Top image is from the Hindi movie Lust Stories
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While marriage brings with it its own set of responsibilities for both partners, it is often the woman who needs to so all the adjustments.
For a 25-year-old women — who tied the knot in March-2014 — the love come arranged marriage brought with it a new city, and also the “responsibility of managing household chores“.
Prior to her marriage, she learned to cook after marriage as her husband “doesn’t cook”.
“I struggled and my husband used to tell me that it would turn out better the next time. Now, I am much a better cook,” said the mother to a three-and-a-half-month-old, who chose to work from home after marriage.
Jaane Jaan is a great standalone flick, but a lot of it could have been handled better, and from the POV of the main character.
Jaane Jaan is a thriller streaming on Netflix and is adapted from Keigo Higashino’s book, ‘The Devotion of Suspect X’. I found the film to be riveting, with a nail-biting build-up. However, in my personal opinion, the climax and the treatment of the female lead was a letdown.
Disclaimer: I haven’t read the book yet, and I am not sure how true the adaptation has stayed to the source material.
(SPOILERS AHEAD. Please read after you watch the movie if you are planning to)
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