If I Am Happy With My 2 Daughters, Why Do You Want Me To Have A Son?

When a mother carries a baby in her womb, she doesn’t care about the child’s gender! She only knows how to love and care for her child.

I am a woman born and brought up in a city and I was given access to good education and the freedom to be myself. With this upbringing and a good career in IT, I was happy with whatever life had to offer.

My parents empowered and inspired me to achieve all that I could dream of. We have extended family in a village and I knew I was the most privileged. My cousins were either given the most basic schooling or married off young. Meanwhile, my father always dreamt of setting me as the example that girls are just as capable as boys.

I always wished to have girls of my own after I got married so I could have the opportunity to give them a very flourishing life. And I also dreamt of passing on the empowered life that I had. Soon, the good news that I was carrying was out there. Everyone had their own guess whether I’d have a girl or a boy.

I was excited about the baby!

Since it was my first, I was simply enjoying the baby growing inside me and wasn’t too bothered about the external noises. Finally, the day came and the nurse announced, ‘It’s a baby girl!’ and I was so excited to see the new-born. I was excited to hold her in my arms and have a close look at the marvellous life that God had gifted me.

As soon as I held her, I started making several promises to her of giving her a good life and being the best mom and always being there for her. But, as expected, my in-laws and extended family were not too happy. They said, ‘Anyway, the first-born is a girl. The second will be a boy.’

I wondered how they could arrive and announce so soon after I’d just delivered my first about my second pregnancy. How could they predict and conclude that the second one would be a boy? Anyway, I let it go, thinking they were just consoling themselves and giving out this utterly useless statement.

After my first child turned a year old, there was a constant pressure to have another child. In India, women are, quite literally, treated as baby-making machines across all sections of society.

I was worried throughout the pregnancy

Thus, after a lot of drama and threats from my ‘better half’ and my in-laws, I was forced into having another child. This time, I was quite nervous since I knew they expected me to birth their ‘favourite’ gender.

Throughout the nine months of my pregnancy, I was constantly depressed or anxious and I secretly wished that even this child were a girl. I wanted the two sisters to be there for each other throughout their lives. Since I was a teenager, I’d wished to be the mother to girls, rather than boys.

Finally, the day arrived and my dream came true. The nurse announced, ‘It’s a baby girl!’ My happiness knew no bounds and my elder child was excited to welcome her little sister. Though my husband was happy, he still had many life calculations going on in his mind.

My parents were happy but worried as to how my in-laws would react. As expected, my in-laws were upset and silent for quite a while. That’s when something inside me changed. I realised that I needed to enjoy the life that God gifted me without bothering about what my in-laws felt!

I realised all I cared about was the love I felt for my child

My kids are my strength and I am their strength. I am their world and they are mine.

When a mother carries a baby in her womb, she doesn’t care about the child’s gender! She only knows how to love and care for her child. I strongly believe that when you’re carrying a life inside you, it is the soul that has chosen you. And the soul has no gender. It is only on earth that a hell-like situation is created for women.

But I also believe that with girls, a home will always be akin to heaven only because no one can love you as your daughter will!

Picture credits: Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

Chavvi T

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