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A Moment Of Weakness At The Edge Of A Precipice

Posted: October 6, 2020

The cigarette butt had long been snuffed out as she clutched the edges tightly with her nails digging into the concrete.

Trigger Alert: There is a mention of thoughts of suicide, and may be triggering to a survivor. 

Taking a long whiff of the now disintegrating cigarette stub, she looked towards the horizon where, she once read in her childhood, lived unicorns and rainbows.

Yeah, right!

Her mind sniggered at the memory slide that her heart was putting out. She was long past her naive days and was light years away now but sometimes, she still liked to escape to that land.

Bringing the horizon back into focus, she could just see the twinkling lights at a distance, not from stars but from the night lights spread over acres of shopping districts and establishments.

Sitting at the precipice of the 50-storey building’s roof where she worked with her feet dangling freely in the air, she felt entranced by the sight of the city in front of her. At this time of night, every light and street lamp was ablaze and from her height, it looked like a sea of fireflies, uncharacteristically flying in a swarm.

From her place, she couldn’t see the people of course, but she could still feel their sadness emanating from down below and enveloping her. Or maybe that was her own.

It is this easy, huh. One minute, you are admiring the night life down below, bend a little too low and next minute, you are a splattered tomato on the road.

She shivered at the thought but the idea had started to grow roots in her mind.

Escape everything so easily. Oh, how I wish? It will just feel like I’m flying, right? I can really end it all. At once.

Her palms had started to sweat in anticipation and her mouth had gone dry. The cigarette butt had long been snuffed out as she clutched the edges tightly with her nails digging into the concrete.

“Naomi, here you are. Why the hell have you switched off your phone? Your next client is here. Get down from there immediately. Ughhhh! Dummy, that gown costs more than your life. For God’s sake, you stink! I told you not to smoke during working hours. Pop a mint before heading to the lobby. And yeah, your daughter called, she passed the bar exam. Congoz!”

Naomi slowly got down from her precarious position and sparing the shimmering city one last glance, whispered, “Some other day. I need to celebrate with my daughter tonight.”

If you or anyone you know is feeling depressed or suicidal, here are some of the helplines available in India. Please call. 
Aasra, Mumbai: 022-27546669
Sneha, Chennai: 044-2464 0050
Lifeline, Kolkata: 033-2474 4704
Sahai, Bangalore: 080–25497777
Roshni, Hyderabad: 040-66202000, 040-66202001

Image source: shutterstock

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Loves words and hence loves reading and writing. A mother of 3 year old, who

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