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Dealing with negativity and toxicity is one of the most difficult things that could happen to you. However, if you follow this technique, it might just be easier!
There’s nothing worse than living in a toxic environment. Whether it is in your personal or professional life. Whatever is around you reflects on your mood, your thoughts your goals and your motivation.
Our minds, beliefs and thoughts are quite sensitive to negativity. Thus, we tend to get more and more attracted to it while also being disturbed by it. Being in a toxic environment of any sort if quite unhealthy and can really affect your health in the long run.
I recently learnt of a technique to deal with the negativity and I wish I’d have learnt of it sooner, when I was in college and had just began working. It is a simple technique that can change things not just around you but also bring a sense of calm within you.
I am sure you’ve heard of being compassionate. It is something that has circulated a number of times in the past two years. Especially with the focus on self-compassion. But it does tend to become less and less possible to practice self-compassion when your surroundings are messy and chaotic. It is like living in a land full of garbage. No one would want to live or work in such a place.
And if you’re asking, “What can we do?” Well, it isn’t really in your control to change the people, their thoughts or their beliefs.
So, what do you do when your surroundings are dirty? You clean the mess up, make it tidier, so you can live in it. And you also deal with the smell and the dust to ensure that you can breathe some fresh air. When this happens, you don’t just live peacefully, but you end up creating more too!
But how is it the same when it comes to people? How do you clean the mess and chaos that people come with? That’s where the self-compassion comes in. But before I tell you the details of the technique, there are a few things I would like you to keep in mind.
Compassion is all about kindness and empathy. It is assumed to be spiritual, it can be applied in your professional and personal lives too. People behave the way they do because they’re going through something in their lives. Or because their life script forces them to behave the way they do. Sometimes it hurts them sometimes it hurts others.
You may not be able to fix their lives or the life story, but there are a couple of things that you can do.
Try as much as you to not get sucked into any drama. It will only make the situation worse. And it would be a little more difficult if it involves you directly. So try to stay away from any and every kind of drama.
This one is easier said than done. But it definitely makes life simpler. When you judge someone or something, there is a fixed mindset that you form about the person or the event. This tends to create a more negative environment especially about the person or situation. And that in turn, makes it very difficult for you to change your perceptions later.
For your own peace of mind, when people get extremely difficult to deal with, keep them at bay. Every once in a while, we tend to get sucked in to their drama. This tends to happen at work when boundaries aren’t set and there is an unnecessary conflict.
Now, I am not saying you keep mum or be unfriendly, but when you create your boundaries, there is a chance you stay away from the negativity.
I promise you that is not as clichéd or as impossible as it sounds. By being practical, I mean you need to be more observant to your surroundings. Read between the lines and pay attention to people and their behaviour, attitudes, motives. Now find a balance to stay grounded. None of these points imply or suggest that you live in a bubble and cannot deal with things. Even though these are repeated norms and points they are useful to help deal with negativity on a daily basis.
Okay. I am sure you’re ready to learn the technique now.
It is quite simple, actually. All you need to do is breathe. As you breathe in, say, “I am inhaling all the negativity around me” then as you exhale, say, “I a am spreading positivity all around me.”
And that’s it.
It may seem like an odd method, but it is recommended as one of Buddhist meditation techniques. This act of compassion is one for others. It is also one of the ways to not just keep your surroundings happy and clean but also helps others in a number of ways. By doing this little exercise you are not taking in the negativity inward but changing it into positive and spreading that with everyone outside.
The benefit of doing this exercise is that you are working with your mind rather than words and actions. That in turn, helps not only one person but all the others around you too. If they are happy and cheerful, so are you. You don’t necessarily put in a lot of efforts.
However, it is imperative that you understand that you aren’t controlling what happens to others. You are, actually, changing your own perspective towards people and situations.
Additionally, it helps you calm down if you are someone who tends to get anxious due to negativity around you.
I use this technique from time to time and I find an instant change. Now, I hope it helps you too.
A version of this was earlier published here.
Picture credits: Pexels
A Psychologist, Blogger, Entrepreneur, bibliophile, stationary buff. Love writing, poetry, coffee, An introvert and dreamer.
Fascinated by drama, interviews and human behaviour. read more...
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