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I live in a society infested with humans who irrespective of being educated or uneducated can harm me.
Beware of Dogs
Growing up as a child reading this signboard always scared me. The owners of the house always welcomed me saying that these creatures are harmless. In my defence, I would always say they are animals after all and not educated enough to make the decision and can harm anybody anytime. With my initial apprehension I would enter their house and after a while I would feel comfortable and realised animals wouldn’t harm unless provoked.
Where are the signs today??
Beware of humans.
I live in a society infested with humans who irrespective of being educated or uneducated can harm me. And I cannot even read the sign “Beware”!! Do we really need to be educated to simply understand brutality and crime. They do not need any kind of provocation to commit such heinous crimes.
I am soon to be 40 and my daughter is soon to be 10. Are any of us safe? Are we safe at any time of the day? Can I be guaranteed I am safe at 10 a.m. in the morning? Are we safe in any particular city be it Kolkata, Bangalore, Gurgaon or Hyderabad or any remote village of the country? Are we safe if we are wearing a full clad salwar kameez Or a short dress?
Are we really safe even with the ever evolving technology? Can help reach me at the touch of a button just as easy as food arrives at my service? Can you assure me rape happens only when provoked? Is there any statistics which says such crimes are only committed by illiterate people who do not have a sense of judgement? Can you assure me I am safe driving my own vehicle and not booking a cab late at night?
The bigger question “Am I even safe in my own home or school or office or travelling in a public transport? ”
Can I be guaranteed 0 rape by any political party I expectantly vote for?
Why should I keep demanding for justice for a crime which is unprovoked and uncalled for?
This post is not about any one off case which gets highlighted by the media . This is about a crime which is getting committed every breathing second of our lives, pardon my statistics.
Will any new hashtag created on web stop this crime? Will any amount of media hype stop this crime?
Because I do not want to plead for justice.I just want to breathe in safe air . And no, the pollution in the air is not what I am talking about.
Please let us live.
Image via Pixabay
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
Darlings makes some excellent points about domestic violence . For such a movie to not follow through with a resolution that won't be problematic, is disappointing.
I watched Darlings last weekend, staying on top of its release on Netflix. It was a long-awaited respite from the recent flicks. I wanted badly to jump into its praise and will praise it, for something has to be said for the powerhouse performances it is packed with. But I will not be able to in a way that I really had wanted to.
I wanted to say that this is a must-watch on domestic violence that I stand behind and a needed and nuanced social portrayal. But unfortunately, I can’t. For I found Darlings to be deeply problematic when it comes to the portrayal of domestic violence and how that should be dealt with.
Before we rush to the ‘you must be having a problem because a man was hit’ or ‘much worse happens to women’ conclusions, that is not what my issue is. I have seen the praises and criticisms, and the criticisms of criticisms. I know, from having had close associations with non-profits and activists who fight domestic violence not just in India but globally, that much worse happens to women. I have written a book with case studies and statistics on that. Neither do I have any moral qualms around violence getting tackled with violence (that will be another post some day).