Read our prestigious winners at the 10th Laadli Media Awards, on India’s Low Divorce Rate and The Sexual Violence of Flashing.

As I Turn 39 Today, I’d Like To Write A Note To Myself

Posted: September 25, 2019

“Eclectic, interesting…will fill you with hope and resolve!” – Pick up our new short story collection, Women.Mutiny

Turning 39, the last year before she gets into her 40s, the writer looks back at her life and tells herself a few home truths about what she should do ahead.

I will be 39 years old today. I have one more year of enjoying being in the 30s, and I will ensure I enjoy this year to the fullest.

Honesty hurts but I will tell myself the truth, and put these things down to remind myself at some point in time later.

Work to support yourself is essential

It is very important to work. Whatever job you do, it is very important to do it. Even if you earn daily Rs 500 by selling food on Foodbuddy, you should do it.

Financial independence is not just about supporting your family, but about being able to spend Rs 1 on something your son wants or just wanting to buy something because you feel down without feeling guilty about it. It is your own hard-earned money, and you will cherish and enjoy the spending.

You’re important, take care of yourself

I have learnt that no matter how tired you are, it is essential to take care of yourself.

We all say that we are very busy with our family etc., but those 30 minutes of walk everyday helps your body grow and strengthen immunity. Research has shown that walking (or as they say carrying your own body weight) strengthens the bones, reduces high blood pressure, and increases your stamina. Just walking does wonders. It does not cost money, nor are you expected to go to a gym. Just walk for 30 minutes.

Your happiness is in your hands

You must have heard this many times, but again I say that your happiness depends on you, and not on anyone else. The world is not here to molly-coddle you. People might always find fault in you. It does not mean that the world is mean. It is just the way humans work. People like to harp on other’s faults.

If you want praise (very few people praise genuinely), then post a picture of yourself or your work (like a photograph you took of a child eating an ice cream) and post it on Instagram. You will get comments and likes. But this cannot be inner happiness. You might need to cry it out alone, in the bathroom sometimes, but it helps.

Making time for yourself

I always now give myself an hour every day. I write or read articles or browse photographs.

I think no matter how happily you are married, it is very important to give yourself time to pursue your hobbies. Even if you wish to colour like a child, you should do it. You get one life and you should give yourself time to do what you love. I love watching plays and twice a month I go to watch a play or a musical show. I am entranced by how talented the artists are.

Knowing who your friends are

It is very important to have friends. Relationships take time to nurture and develop like a plant. No one can stay alone.

But sometimes friends can hurt you. I now don’t divulge my secrets to anyone. Instead I think its better to talk about a varied topics like clothes, cooking, books, travel etc depending on each group. Try and give each friend a time once a month. Dont expect anything in return but just go out and observe how similar/dissimilar you are from them.

Dealing with women’s issues in my everyday

The last thing which is very important to me is appreciating and acknowledging women\’s issues. One at a time, make a difference in your life. Get your husband involved in household chores. Make him teach your kid one subject even though you could do it. Do the taxes (which for me is a daunting task). Make a difference in the world. Be passionate towards women with problems and try to help them.

Image source: pixabay

Liked this post?

Register at Women's Web to get our weekly mailer and never miss out on our events, contests & best reads! Or - get a couple of really cool reads on your phone every day - click here to join our Telegram channel.

Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views. Individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times. If you have a complementary or differing point of view, sign up and start sharing your views too!

I love to write on women's issues. I strongly believe that every woman is

Learn More

Managing your health when work & home boundaries dissolve with Sucheta Pal - WICA 2020

Comments

Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!

Do you want to be part of a network curated for working women?