Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
Do we really encourage our children to follow their hearts? Or do we force them to dance to the tunes that move ours?
Year 1997
The atmosphere in the Bahl house was tense. Something unusual had happened two days back. It seemed that Dr. Bahl and Dr.(Mrs) Bahl had both received in a shock. The Bahl couple — the best doctor couple combination possible (he a cardiologist and she a gynaecologist) – proud owners of numerous degrees and felicitations both national and international immediately felt all their hard work and pride biting the dust in a moment’s time. Their seventeen-year-old son had shared his intention of becoming a musician and dedicating the rest of his life to playing and synthesizing music after his class 12th!
A doctor family of many generations, Rishy Bahl was the only son of Mrs. and Mr. Bahl whose shoulders bore the heavy burden of carrying the family tradition of picking up medicine and becoming a highly paid medico in the country. While they were fine having him pursue music as a hobby for which he was gifted with the best of instruments and allowed to appear for international university examinations, nothing beyond that made its way through the parents’ minds. The left side of Rishy’s brain was as logical and competent as his right side was creative and fertile which made him perform well as a science student as well as excel in piano recitals! Something which was becoming a bane for him.
Under parental pressure, Rishy had filled in forms for all the entrance examinations including dentistry and was blackmailed to appear in all of them. One day as he returned home after appearing in one of the exams — he felt extremely frustrated and torn. Though he had tried his best to ensure that he wasn’t successful in any of the exams — yet, he shuddered to think about what if he made it through any of these exams; what if he never got the chance to pursue what he wanted for the rest of his life. He felt tormented. He decided to put his step down that day and explicitly say “no” to everyone’s playing with his life. He was determined to confront everyone who came his way that day!
However, destiny had its own plans. At that very moment, Rishy got a call from the hospital. Mr. Bahl, his father had a massive attack! Though Mr. Bahl was saved, the incident killed the thought and the courage that Rishy had mustered to confront his parents about his dream in life. Well, as the results of various entrance examinations came out, it seemed his efforts in ensuring that he failed in them were successful. However, considering the happenings at home — Rishy proposed something to his parents. That day a deal was locked. A barter was done! That seemed the only way Rishi could live his dream.
Year 2003
His chain of thoughts broke as his name was announced at the felicitation. The final year batch of dentists was getting felicitated today with their doctorate. Young medicos were beaming with happiness and excitement for the next phase of their lives. Some of them would join reputed hospitals while others would start their own practice. But there was one person — who simply felt free today as he wove the plans to just play his piano incessantly. Yes, today was the day of his independence. His part of the barter had been fulfilled. After Rishi received his degree — he handed it over to his parents and said — “For you — mom and dad. My part of deal is the done and now please let me be free. I want to leave and pursue my dream.”
Mrs. and Mr. Bahl were speechless; they had thought that the years of hard work would change their son’s mind but in vain. Rishy had done his bit to ensure the family tradition and his parents’ pride in their circles remained and now they had to keep their word. He was now Dr. Rishy Bahl.
Rishy went ahead and pursued his dream and passion to become one of the best musicians in the city, country and then was acknowledged worldwide.
May 2017
It was the annual piano concert of my bestie’s son. I was just accompanying the mother-son duo as the son was performing and at some point in my life I loved playing piano so much. Rishy was the chief guest. As he addressed the audience with his story — he had only one message for children — to listen and follow their heart and more importantly for the parents — to encourage kids to live their dream instead of pushing their own dreams and aspirations! How lovely..
What could have been a better way to pass on to a lovely message from someone who didn’t stop but went ahead to chase his dream and passion — a musician who happens to be a dentist! Someone who followed his heart.
My chain of thoughts got interrupted! Buzz, buzz — I silenced it — my mobile. It was my boss looking for an update. With some courage, I switched off the phone. I was thinking about what I had wanted to do but couldn’t many years back. How I could but didn’t follow my heart!
(Inspired by incidents in the life of Mr. Ricky Kej, Grammy award winner — a renowned musician and conservationist with a doctorate in dentistry! His speech and story at my child’s piano concert inspired me to write this to pass on the message, hope it moves you also and touches somewhere deep in the heart! )
Because it’s important to listen to and follow your heart!
First published here.
Image via Pexels
Present - India Lead - Education, Charter for Compassion, Co-Author - Escape Velocity, Writer & Social Activist. Past - DU, Harvard, Telecoms-India and abroad read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
Please enter your email address