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Having spent every waking hour tending to his needs, she suddenly felt frightfully lonely. It hurt her to even think of tomorrow, when she would wake up alone.
Her tear-stained eyes spoke to him, “It’s time to let go! You are in too much pain… Please don’t feel guilty, I know it isn’t your fault. This is how it’s meant to be. I’ll be fine. I’ll endure, I have to! Promise!”
As his eyelids slowly shut, she saw the signals on the monitor that he was hooked to become still…he had left her forever!
Alone in a house that was far too crowded, the urge to heave in sorrow suffocated her. But the children were upset and she had to contain herself for their sake. Her eyes burned and chest felt painfully heavy. She just wanted to escape….and cry; cry till her eyes were drained of tears. And drift into a dreamless sleep to forget the pain!
She was so used to his presence, the silence and emptiness felt overwhelming! Having spent every waking hour tending to his needs, she suddenly felt frightfully lonely. It hurt her to even think of tomorrow, when she would wake up alone. Knowing she would never see him again.
She wished she could remember him as he was in the photo on her table, handsome and smiling. But painful memories of illness and suffering tormented her mind. That was all that remained of him now…Memories!
She was bitter, angry and resented fate for this unfair turn of events that had derailed her life forever. But there was so much to be done now; paperwork, bills to settle, arrangements for the funeral, guests! And new challenges every single day… she wasn’t used to all this and barely knew where to begin.
But the distraction was good, it kept her from dwelling on the last few days! She found the strength to attend to responsibilities that awaited her and attempt things she’d never done before.
Days soon became months, and before she knew it a year had passed. The sadness never left her fully. She learned to live with it. It was now a part of her, just as he had always been.
But she was a different person now. She learned to step out of her comfort zone and do things she never thought she could. She made difficult decisions, and bore the consequence of her actions herself. It was a continuous struggle, but she coped. She was now a changed woman; stronger than ever before; no longer dependent, no longer protected.
She began to take care of herself like she always ought to have, for she realized she needed the strength and health to face her future. She learned to drive and go to places on her own. She lavished affection on her children, even as she sternly guided them towards what was right. She sought advice when needed, but the decisions were entirely hers.
She was a fighter and a survivor; stronger than ever before! She lived life one day at a time, rising to every trial that life threw at her and grieving in silence but staying strong…..learning things the tough way and going strong. She was fine, and was sure she would endure just like she had promised him….till the day when they would finally be together again!
Image source: shutterstock
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Always on the lookout for new things to learn, I am a voracious reader, globetrotter, ambitious cook and mom to two precious little men. While I'm not experimenting in the kitchen or resolving sibling read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
Darlings makes some excellent points about domestic violence . For such a movie to not follow through with a resolution that won't be problematic, is disappointing.
I watched Darlings last weekend, staying on top of its release on Netflix. It was a long-awaited respite from the recent flicks. I wanted badly to jump into its praise and will praise it, for something has to be said for the powerhouse performances it is packed with. But I will not be able to in a way that I really had wanted to.
I wanted to say that this is a must-watch on domestic violence that I stand behind and a needed and nuanced social portrayal. But unfortunately, I can’t. For I found Darlings to be deeply problematic when it comes to the portrayal of domestic violence and how that should be dealt with.
Before we rush to the ‘you must be having a problem because a man was hit’ or ‘much worse happens to women’ conclusions, that is not what my issue is. I have seen the praises and criticisms, and the criticisms of criticisms. I know, from having had close associations with non-profits and activists who fight domestic violence not just in India but globally, that much worse happens to women. I have written a book with case studies and statistics on that. Neither do I have any moral qualms around violence getting tackled with violence (that will be another post some day).