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When in love, negative signs in a relationship are the furthest from your mind – but you need to be mindful of them to not be caught unawares.
Love does that to you. When it strikes, you grab it with both hands and legs as if your very existence depends on it. You do not look out for the red flags. Oh no, you are busy living your dreams while ignoring the negative signs in the relationship.
Have you ever wondered how much better it would be if you paid attention to the hurdles and chills in your love life? We bring you a list of 10 negative signs in a relationship to look out for.
Does your lover never seem to have enough time for you? Do you find yourself pleading and begging for their time?
If this is you, then the writing is on the wall. Do not waste time displaying your unconditional love anymore. Simply pick up your stuff, snatch your heart and run. And yes, never make the mistake of looking back for you could repent.
Your lover sees you as an option and nothing more.
Now, this can be tricky if you are an emotional fool. When two people get close, one can never gauge the extent immediately. Your vulnerable points and triggers can land you in a mess from time to time.
If you are the kind that accepts everything, thinking it to be holistic or that you may be lovestruck, watch out for drama and showdowns where you are the chosen one for blames and disharmony.
Get out of the mess fast and save a life- “yours.”
Are you the one fixing dates and outings most of the times? Do you have to call your lover always to find out what they’ve been up to? Do you find yourself waiting for a call, text or message from them but nothing happens?
My dear, they have moved on from the spot you have earmarked for them. And it is time you did this too. What is the use of trying to run the show alone when you are aware of a flop looming large?
Do You find yourself being insulted most of the time? Is everything made out to be your fault? Are you yelled at often?
If this is you, always at the receiving end, then it is time to wipe the slate clean and move on. Can’t it be their fault?
If you find yourself feeling like an uninvited guest or worse like a gatecrasher at gatherings your lover takes you to, it is time to pull up your socks, wear your shoes and run. If they cannot introduce you to their circle of family and friends, you don’t stand much chance and your future looks bleak.
Are your conversations beginning to sound like abuses ringing from a place of indifference? Do you have to remind them to be polite and considerate with you? Have they taken you for granted?
If they are not considerate, they have moved on mentally and it is only a matter of time before they announce the end.
It has been a few days since you have spoken and you have started to get fidgety and nervous. You call them only to find your calls unanswered. Your texts get the same treatment. No one is ever that busy so as to ignore all messages.
It is time for you to take the message and exit gracefully.
Do they have to leave to sort out stuff, in the first place? Things can be addressed while remaining in the relationship itself. Escapism is not love, rather it is just an adventure.
If you find yourself going that extra mile to bring them back every single time, do not pat yourself on the back. What you are doing is inconsequential as someone that has distanced himself cannot be of much use in a relationship.
If you find them avoiding you under some or the other pretext, it is time to heed the warning signs. Why would someone that loves you want to ignore or avoid you? Even when you meet or speak, the interaction is brief and ends abruptly.
You know that something is not right but want to hang on due to your fixation with the relationship. Do yourself a favour. It is okay to walk away.
There is a lot more to talk about other than problems when in love. If this person tends to bring up problems all the time, know that all is not well. Are you always listening to excuses about a busy work life and a chaotic home situation? It is another way to keep you busy as you try to fix their problems that may not exist at all.
Now that you know what you are in for, why don’t you be good to yourself? Go and get a life, away from the negative person!
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Published here earlier.
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Kavita Panyam is a Counseling Psychologist by profession and a Freelance writer by passion. She
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