7 Fantabulous Parenting Tips From Bollywood, Cos That’s The Best Way To Learn, Isn’t It!

Posted: January 13, 2018

7 parenting tips from Bollywood – inspired straight from blockbuster movies we LOVE, which are clearly the best way to learn how to parent. Dig in!

Bollywood movies are amazing. I mean, have you seen the songs, dance sequences, and over-the-top clothes which make you feel rich for 3 hours? Apart from this happy illusion, Bollywood movies are also very didactic. They tell you about SO many things, subtly of course.

Bollywood excels in parenting lessons. You just have to look closely to spot them. Don’t fret! We have done the honours for you and have you covered for life. You’re welcome.

Make more kids

First things, first. Start having children the moment you get married ok? Don’t make your parents go through the effort of asking you about khush khabri. No. Emotional and physical stability is irrelevant. Have children when your parents. Now, this might look like a ‘how to be good children’ lesson, but trust me, this was necessary.

marriage market hypocrisy

When you JUST got married, and they dancing about the number of kids you gon’ have in like 5 mins…

Dad be like this…

Dads should never speak to their children without inciting extreme fear. If your children can talk to you comfortably, then you have failed as a dad. Tch tch. Effective communication is for the W E A K.

When your child’s tryna talk but you’re having none of that BS. Nope.

Hai mera bachcha!

On that note, mothers are supposed to do all the communication that is lacking from the paternal side. Treat your son like a precious gem, and your daughters like paraya dhan cuz that’s how you gotta roll. Your sole aim in life is their shaadi. Good luck!

When the guy has izzat, shohrat and paisa but your daughter says she loves someone else but you don’t seem to understand.

Off to Boarding!

Sending your children to boarding school is the one-stop solution to all the issues they have. Make sure it’s a draconian school, and that there is no music/art/dance teacher who might accidentally tap into your child’s mind and ruin their life 🙂

Haaw, your child makes his own decisions?

Don’t let your children make their own decisions, they’ll ALWAYS end up doing drugs. Unless you’re a single parent, then you’re supposed cool and unconcerned about your child. That’s how it is. * shrugs*

When you did all the essential strict parent stuff but you have no idea why your daughter eloped with a guy!

When your child is ruining their life but it’s okay because you’re a single parent and you’re chill

Shaadi = Solves everything

Their shaadi/love life is totally at your mercy. Unruly child? Just make them marry someone of your choice, problem solved. Now the headache has shifted from your head to their partner. Don’t worry if the couple is not  compatible, what is done is done. Divorce is a myth.

When you don’t understand where your very adult child learned the word ‘divorce’ from…

DIL will steal your jigar ka tukda

Speaking of shaadi, if you have a son then be prepared for him to be manipulated by his necessary witch of a wife and move out of your house. The fact that you chose her is irrelevant. All DILs are vamps who want to steal your son from you.

These are some tips that a must follow for all you parents out there. Make sure you follow them tot he dot. Of course, any unforeseen incident or a runaway child is not my responsibility. 🙂

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18// New Delhi, India A literature student on the path of her identity. I like

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