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This poem takes a look at the myriad things a girl is blamed for; often, simply for existing. A powerful read.
You were groped, but the blame is on you!
You were taking the public transport to your college. But you had a bust and a butt. How seductive! Your fellow passenger was tempted to squeeze them. So the blame is on you.
You were molested, but the blame is on you!
You were wearing inappropriate attire; doesn’t matter what it was – short skirt, pants, saree, burkha, it just provoked your molester. So the blame is on you.
You were raped, but the blame is on you!
You were drunk, hence under the influence of ‘Western culture’. How disgraceful! The man under the influence of sacred ‘Indian culture’ had the right to violate you; you were tipsy-turvy. So the blame is on you.
Your dupatta was pulled by those youngsters on the street near your house, but the blame is on you!
First of all, you were out in broad daylight, and second, your dupatta was flowing freely. Such flamboyance is uncalled for. So the blame is on you.
A group of men tore your clothes off, manhandled you and bashed up your boyfriend. But the blame is on you!
You were out in the dark and accompanied by a male friend. How immoral! How appalling! So the blame is on you.
Acid was thrown in your face by a jilted lover. But the blame is on you!
You had such a pretty face, and you talked freely to men. What an easy woman you were! And then you had the guts to say ‘No’ to one of your admirers. The blame is on you, girl.
The blame is on you and you alone!
Because boys will be boys,
and not all men are rapists.
You were clearly at fault, each time, every time.
You were simply asking for it!
Cover yourself from head to toe; don’t show half-an-inch of your skin. Oh wait, how will you hide your feminine silhouette? Well, just stop stepping out in daylight, or in the dark. Stop drinking or getting influenced by ‘Western culture’. You want to have fun? Don’t even think of it. Stay within the confines of your four walls.
Or simply stop breathing. Stop existing.
A victim blamer
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Journalist, photographer, blogger who loves to chronicle everything from mundane to magnificent.
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Relatives kissing children's penises made me wonder how this is leaving boys vulnerable to potential abuse under the garb of affection.
As we witness in all Indian family gatherings – whether a wedding, a birthday, or a summer vacation – nostalgia soaks us all.
However, one such gathering exposed me to a horrific practice that, though common in many houses worldwide, is very problematic.
It all started with my horror at hearing one of the supposedly funny anecdotes about my cousin’s birth.
Many men suffer from an inferiority complex when their women are earning. They feel their wives will rise higher in the professional worlds.
I hear many women tell me about how they are privileged that their husbands do not want them to work.
One claims that her husband wants her to have a luxurious life and just relax and rest. Another feels her husband just wants her to stay at home and enjoy cooking. Some feel that their husbands just want them to look after the children. Some other women look at these women and feel that they are so lucky and fortunate to have such loving and caring husbands.
My question to these luxurious women is that then why did you educate yourselves? Why did you painstakingly study? Is your purpose in life to only be dependent on your husbands for money? Do you not have any skills that can be utilized? What about teaching and showing others what you have learnt.