Single (Again) In A New City And Enjoying It

A woman writes on why you should enjoy your me time, when out in a new city on your own.

I love to rant, especially when I find myself in a new city. I stayed at home only till my 12th standard results were out, and have been moving around different places for study and work. And the escapades have never eluded me. While most new cities brought with them the company of roommates, boyfriend(s), husband; it is in Bangalore that I find myself truly single, again.

A new job brought me into the IT capital of India for the first time. Living out of a suitcase was not a new affair for me, in fact, I considered myself a veteran in this field. But initially, fear hounded me, as I left the comfort zone of my home after a gap of around 4 years. Would my child throw too many tantrums, and make life difficult for her father and grandparents? Did I still have it in me to survive alone in a totally new place? Would the risk I took, be worth it?

Nudging all these apprehensions aside, I tried to focus on the bigger picture (with help from my guardian angels, read friends and family). My takeaways:

• Kids mostly have no recollection of memories past a certain age, so if my kid and I survived this, she wasn’t likely to make me feel guilty about leaving her.
• Bangalore was teeming with friends and acquaintances, some much cherished ones. So I took this opportunity to double up this work trip as a means of meeting few people after a gap of almost 14 years. I consider myself a gregariously social being, and these rendezvous were like adrenaline shots (or Botox if you will). Going back and mulling on old days is never passé.
• I had a surplus of free time, so much that at time I longed for some chores (I can see raised eyebrows!). Everything was provided for in the apartment where I lived, from housekeeping to meals, so practically, I didn’t have to move a finger. Although I love to keep my home neat and cook meals and do so with utmost regularity, this was like winning a lottery!
• Total focus at work. We cannot help but worry if children fall ill, or think about providing for the needs of our home and hearth. So it becomes doubly demanding when we are faced with a pressing timeline. Working extra hours takes its toll on work-life balance. In these two months I enjoyed the liberty of being absorbed completely in what I was doing.
• Opportunity to explore a new city and understand its culture. What you hear about a place is true only as long as you experience it. I visited different parts of the city, used different modes of transport, experienced different weather conditions, and got an overall perspective of what it would be like to live in this place, its challenges and advantages alike.
• Plenty of ME time ;to get dressed and decide on what to wear, to ogle at shop windows incessantly, eat alone at a restaurant, watch the night show with cousins and friends, revel in being all grown up and independent.

So if an opportunity to travel alone to a new city presents itself, do not be scared; assess if the trip would be a value add in your life and career, then work on the logistics – make sure the family is taken care of, ensure you have a safe and comfortable place to live, work out your commute, keep emergency contacts of friends you can reach ready at your disposal, make a list of knowledge or skills you wish to acquire in this duration, and another of long lost friends you want to catch up with – and finally, let your hair down and enjoy this time!

Young woman traveler image via Shuterstock

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