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Often, we assume that a victim of marital rape (or domestic violence in general) should be able to walk out of her marriage easily. Here's why it doesn't happen.
Often, we assume that a victim of marital rape (or domestic violence in general) should be able to walk out of her marriage easily. Here’s why it doesn’t happen.
It does seem to be a simple solution. A direct and easy way out of a troublesome marriage is to break away from it. The easiest way to move away from a spouse who violates you is to leave him/her.
But is reality that simple? Is it that straightforward?
In India, marriage is an institution. It is a sacred institution. You have to respect it. You have to stand by it. More often than not, there is an unsaid, yet heavy clause hanging by that: “You have to stand by it (or else)”.
The inherent conceptions, perceptions and opinions about marriage are influenced by patriarchy and closeted ‘common sense’. These play a stifling role in warping the minds of victims – of marital rape, or of domestic violence in general – who may want to speak out.
These are some questions that victims may grapple with:
These are just a few scenarios that may play out in a victim’s mind, warping their minds against doing what is best for them.
So if divorce does appear to be a simple way out, just think about it more. There is more to it.
There is so much more.
First posted at the author’s blog
Sad eyes of a woman pic via Shutterstock
Lackadaisical engineer. Student journalist. Football is love. Jam is ecstasy. Dogs: heaven. Reading = breathing. Madras is home. read more...
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I wanted to scream with excitement that my daughter chose to write about her ambition and aspirations over everything else first. To me, this was one of those parenting 'win' moments.
My daughter turned eight years old in January, and among the various gifts she received from friends and family was an absolutely beautiful personal journal for self-growth. A few days ago, she was exploring the pages when she found a section for writing a letter to her future self. She found this intriguing and began jotting down her thoughts animatedly.
My curiosity piqued and she could sense it immediately. She assured me that she would show me the letter soon, and lo behold, she kept her word.
I glanced at her words, expecting to see a mention of her parents in the first sentence. But, to my utter delight, the first thing she had written about was her AMBITION. Yes, the caps here are intentional because I want to scream with excitement that my daughter chose to write about her ambition and aspirations over everything else first. To me, this was one of those parenting ‘win’ moments.
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