Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
As a part of Asexuality Awareness Week (26th October to 1st November 2014), this article is an effort to raise awareness about asexuality, and dispel the common myths associated with it.
Asexuality refers to the lack of an intrinsic desire to indulge in sexual intercourse with another person.This does not mean that asexuals, also known as aces, cannot seek intimate relationships and are orientation-less. It simply means that they may or may not prefer romantic relationships over sexual ones.
There is a lot of misinformation and plenty of myths attached to this concept. Therefore, aces may often end up feeling alienated and mocked in society. It is, thus, very important to increase awareness and build a vocabulary about asexuality in mainstream media.
For starters, asexuality is different from abstinence or celibacy, which basically refer to a choice by a person to avoid sex for personal reasons or religious beliefs. In fact, a lot of asexual people may choose to have sex (whether they like it or not) for many reasons – which may include a conscious desire to please their partner(s) or to have children.
Asexuals may also differ from each other by the way they define and live out their relationships. In reality, a lot of aces may fall under a spectrum called Grey A which contains a whole range of activities. For instance, there may be aces who may have sexual intercourse but very rarely or not at all. Some may even experience libido and sexual attraction, but not strong enough to act on it.
Demisexuals fall under this spectrum – they experience sexual attraction only when they establish a strong emotional relationship with a specific person. Some aces may even feel an aesthetic attraction and even desire physical intimacy in the form of hugs, kisses, etc.
Lastly, there is nothing wrong with asexuals, be it biologically, hormonally or emotionally. Asexuality is not a pathological condition, and needs no treatment. However, it is important to note that often “research” can be used to justify problematic ideas that are in fact highly socialized.
We need to consider the fact that homosexuality was once seen as a psychological ailment by many respected scientific institutions such as the APA (American Psychiatric Association) till the 1970s. In the same manner, asexuality is mistakenly regarded as a disease and something that needs to be treated or corrected. The amount of physical and psychological abuse and violence faced by aces is harmful to their self-worth and confidence.
Asexuals need to embrace themselves the way they are, but more importantly, the rest of the society needs to adopt a sensitive attitude about the unique issues faced by them.
Become an asexual ally and engage in a positive and useful conversation about the topic!
Pic credits: Comic about myths surrounding asexuality. Concept Image of love via Shutterstock.
An engineer. Has worked in the IT industry for a while and then decided to move to the social sector. Interested in feminist and sex positive ideas/praxis. In all, wants to live a life read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
Please enter your email address