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Body image among children takes a beating when parents stress that only some kinds of bodies are acceptable - The #CanWeTalkAboutThis campaign
Guest Post By Uttama, Founder & Editor of South Asian Parent
You know you’ve said it. Out loud, in public, and in front of your children.
In fact, we all say the F-word over and over again without realizing it.
It’s more than just the word ‘fat’ however; these obscenities hide in our everyday conversations, affecting the way children develop the standards by which they judge themselves, and each other.
“She’d be so much prettier if she wasn’t fat.”
“He’s too dark.”
“She’s too thin; she looks sick.”
“He’s so fat.”
As a society and a community, we are obsessed with our looks. We fixate on outer appearance to the cost of inner contentment. In an extreme form, the implications clearly show in the increasing number of people affected by eating disorders.
But even in its mildest form, if we are not careful of the words we use around our children, we are raising a generation of people fixated on fitting into a socially-acceptable body size—lacking the security needed to be confident in their own skin, no matter how light or dark.
#CanWeTalkAboutThis releases this poster to show that the words we throw around so easily in day-to-day conversations have ‘weight’. They fall heavily on young ears and sink to the bottom of their spirits, spilling into so many aspects of their self-esteem.
We’d like to ask:
Is it sensible to believe, and to teach, that only one body form is attractive? Should we be talking about how people come in all shapes and sizes? Has our surface appearance become too important for us to shift focus inwards? Would it be beneficial to develop healthy eating and living instead? Can we change our F-word from fat to fit? If we want our children to give greater importance to inner character, don’t we have to demonstrate how to do that by our own actions first? Can we let go of thinking ‘fat’?
We want to know what you think. Add your voice to the #CanWeTalkAboutThis campaign here.
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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