A story of love, loss and second chances by Nikita Singh, releasing this Valentine’s Day.
Are you taking care of the calcium needs of your child ?
I am a harassed Indian male, only I didn’t know it. I hereby acknowledge with gratitude the role played by the All India Men’s Welfare Association (AIMWA) in opening my eyes to the harassment, sexual exploitation, torture and abuse that I face at the hands of women day in and day out, to the extent that they want my breed to be extinct.
I am also grateful to AIMWA for bringing the following facts to my knowledge, so that I can stand up and fight for myself and my tortured brethren-
-More than 90% of Indian men face emotional, economical, verbal and physical abuse at the hands of their wives and in-laws
-The society considers kicking, punching and slapping men as acceptable and even laudable behavior on the part of women and girls.
-Men do not have the choice of vocation. They are expected to subordinate their preferences to the needs of others in the family
-Additionally, men are emotionally castrated right from the age of 6 as they are discouraged from expressing their pain and feelings. Emotional suppression has a traumatic effect on boys and the hurt is so deep that boys develop a fear of self-expression and turn numb to abuse for the rest of their life.
I fully endorse the Charter of All India Men’s Welfare Association (AIMWA), which says that the AIMWA addresses issues concerning men and boys, with the specific objective of providing them protection against gender discrimination, domestic violence, emotional castration, negative stereotyping, sexual harassment, legal terrorism and every other form of abuse.
I fully agree with AIMWA when it says:
-The society considers boys and men as an expendable commodity at the time of crises.
-The society forces men to take the last place in the queue for rescue in case of calamities.
-The society characterizes men as reckless, irresponsible and incapable of taking care of themselves or their children.
-The society is rapidly replacing men with women, machines and sperm banks and treating men as a disposable species.
-No schemes are being furthered either by the Government or eminent social celebrities for boys the way they are happening for girls. This has led to more boys dropping out of school resulting in increase of juvenile delinquency. Shunned by the society, such boys grow up with feelings of inadequacy and could ultimately turn into criminals.
-In addition to stereotyping of men and boys, welfare of boys and men has been seriously neglected in India, post-independence. Men are denied protection from domestic abuse, sexual harassment, social discrimination and also equal access to Government sponsored health care and safety at work place.
My endorsement of AIMWA’s take on sexual exploitation of men by women is complete and unconditional:
-Sexual arousal is discernible in men, whereas it is not obvious in women. As a result, men constantly face the allegation of being obsessed with sex.
-It is believed that men always indulge in sex voluntarily, whereas women are thought to take part in sex either to fulfill the sexual or emotional needs of men or because they are forced to do so by men against their will.
-Sexual exploitation and rape of men and boys by women is not acknowledged as an offence, and in fact it is considered as a non-existent problem.
-Boys and men are coerced or enticed into having sex both within and outside marriage.
-Boys and men are blackmailed into having sex within and outside marriage.
-Boys and men face allegations of rape or threats by women who indulge in consensual sex only with the intention of forcing men into marrying them, to extort money and other ulterior motives.
-Married men also face abuse from wives who withhold sex as a means to blackmail, take revenge, or to attain other ulterior objectives.
-No legal provisions exist to protect men and boys from molestation, rape or any of the above mentioned forms of sexual exploitation.
I, along with my exploited brothers of the AIMWA, demand that the Government of India set up a National Commission for Men and a Ministry for Men’s Welfare, or I warn the Government that I shall organize a men’s rights protest in all cities of the country on the lines of the protest against nagging wives that AIMWA so brilliantly organized last year.
Show your solidarity towards us exploited men by clicking here. Long live the Brotherhood!
PS: Errors in grammar, syntax or spelling are the AIMWA’s, not mine, but I love these guys.
*Photo credit: kudumomo (Used under the Creative Commons Attribution License)
Note From The Women’s Web Team: This post was meant to express the writer’s astonishment at these aims, not his concurrence. We are adding this clarification on account of some of the perplexed reactions it has caused.
I am a former bureaucrat, and have worked a lot on gender issues, disaster management
Thank you for sharing this post. Even I have been abused by my in laws a number of times and is continuing till now. I did nothing but lost a job and came back to kolkata. Have got a new job. Still they are telling me and my wife that I left the job intentionally, I am a hypocrite, I have no social status, etc. They are not only torturing me mentally but also doing the same to my wife. I don’t understand how a parents can do such evil things to their daughter. The salary I used to get in my previous company is quite higher than what I get today. They have problem in that too. However, both my wife and me are happy with what we are today.
*applause*
Was this supposed to be funny? as in you are making fun of the AIMWA because you feel their beliefs are ludicrous?
I know explaining this kills the joke, but please do humor me.
Anand
I’m sure each one of us can form our own judgment.
I’m truly shocked reading this article not because of the contents but since it came from YOU! What point are you trying to prove? I was expecting to read something else from you. I’m falling short of words to even express what exactly am feeling at the moment..
Agreed there need to be equally stringent laws protecting men from any kind of abuse whether physical, emotional or mental, torture and rape and molestation. However, your argument is inherently misogynist because you keep stressing about men being raped by women, being molested by women, being tortured by women. Men are being raped, molested and tortured by other men too, and on a scale wider than we know off. The point of gender rights is to protect human dignity, freedom and independence regardless of gender. If your point is to awaken readers to men’s rights, your route can’t be “hey you know what, enough of women’s rights because women are out there being bitches” One does not come at the cost of the other. The problem is patriarchy which is system of power and oppressive values and everyone suffers in it. Clearly you cant see it though because you’re a product of the same system and you see things on a very pedestrian simple level of ‘he did that and she did this”. Your research cant be limited to stats, data and law. Go deeper into culture and isolate real problems that are screwing with man, woman and child in this country. And please dont respond to misandry with misogyny. Try to awaken readers to shirk away from both. If you are actually out to make a sociologically sensitive point. If you just wanted to rant then well, you can ignore this comment, please go on.
To the people perplexed by these demands, i must say that some of the problems highlighted are very valid (such as lack of penal provisions to prevent molestation of men). If this post was meant as a joke, then maybe Womens’ Web should reconsider its policy. Feminism isn’t about women’s rights alone. It’s about greater equality, which also means giving men what they are generally deprived of, such as the right to express emotions.
SOLE TESTIMONY to prove an offence is 100% unnatural UNDER IPC 375, 376 because it makes ground for MALPRACTICE of law.
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