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It is so easy to grow apart in a marriage if both of us do not keep abreast of each other. It's important to grow together.
Today, two of my dear friends got married. I wish them lots of love and happy tidings. I know there will be ups and downs, laughter and tears, arguments and making up, but watching them I realise the joy when shared surely is doubled.
It seems like the other day when I got married, I was still in college, pursuing my graduation in Microbiology, a supposedly bright student. It would be wrong to say my parents wanted to see me settled soon because I was equally interested in ‘settling down’ and being so much ‘in love’. Ours was a traditional ‘Love marriage’ approved of by the parents and families.
Over the years we had our share of arguments and reconciliations. But we grew up. We realised we were not the people we imagined the other to be. Being up close shows us more faults than when we see someone from a distance. Being on our best behaviour and clothes for a few hours in a day versus, living in close proximity 24 x 7 has more chances of noticing annoying but realistic habits like nose digging, belching and flatulence.
And I haven’t even come to where one wants tea while the other wants coffee.
As we walk together it is important to keep up with one another else, we grow but probably at different levels and pace. Then we just grow apart. So holding hands is important… to keep abreast.
Often, I was told it’s the person I am that matters, being kind, generous, loving etc. But I have often noticed if both people in a marriage are not following the same guidelines, one may take advantage of the other, taking these qualities for granted and years later arguments increase as the feeling of being taken advantage is akin to being cheated.
For the sake of my marriage, I prioritized my spouse, my kids, and my family duties. For the sake of my marriage, today I have learned to prioritize myself.
So, though ‘Marriage’ is a wonderful institution and brings some of the greatest joys let’s be practical and remember- to stay together we need to work on it together.
Image source: by FatCamera from Getty Images Signature Free for Canva Pro
Educator, author, poet, marathoner, yoga practitioner read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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