Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
Photo by Caroline Veronez on Unsplash
Every girl wants to marry her prince charming. And I was no different. I always wanted to marry a person who would be very romantic. I loved surprises and always thought my future husband would surprise me with gifts, flowers, romantic candle light dinner etc etc. Hmm!! you guessed it right; I have been huge fan of romantic bollywood movies and was too much under illusion. For me, romance meant expressing love with gifts, flowers and listening to romantic hindi duets.
When I married my husband, I realised he is exactly opposite. Before marriage, we met many times. I really liked him as I found him very caring and a responsible person. He is shy by nature and doesn’t talk much. In the beginning, I attributed these qualities of him as romantic. I thought as he is shy, he doesn’t express himself and with time he will change and will become more expressive. Still sometimes he surprised me with his caring and endearing nature. When you love someone, you try to visualise and understand everything the way you want to. You see rightness in faults too.
However as time passes, you start seeing faults in rightness too. That’s what exactly happened with me in early years of our marriage. Earlier when he asked me to choose my own gifts, I believed him to be liberal and respectful of my choices. Later, it changed to be ignorant of my likes and dislikes. I always knew he is reserved by nature, but I still fought with him for not being expressive and romantic. He always helped me with household chores but I still fought with him for not being supportive. Many times we came to the verge of drifting apart although he never let me go.
Things started changing for good after my pregnancy. He took perfect care of me. He never missed any doctor’s appointment; he was always beside me during those pre-natal classes. He made sure I take all the medicines on time and don’t stress myself over small issues. My definition of romanticism was changing.
When I used to work for long hours, he used to take care of our daughter. When I decided to quit my job and become stay at home mom for my daughter, he was there to support me. Its not easy for a working woman to give up her financial independence. Staying at home can become very frustrating at times. During those crucial times, you need someone with whom you can discuss your frustration, your insecurities. I used to take out my frustration on my husband. He ignored it and patiently heard me out. If I was too harsh with my daughter because of my annoyance, he reprimanded me. When I decide to become a blogger, he patiently read my articles and reviewed them with utmost honesty. His supportive nature is now part of my definition of romanticism.
I am seeing him becoming a wonderful father to our kids. After coming from office, he plays with them no matter how tired he is! He plays with them like a friend; he fights with them like a sibling; he pampers his cubs like a king. Whenever I see them together playing, fighting, laughing, I cannot take my eyes off. That is the most beautiful sight for me; I cannot stop admiring him for being an adorable father. And that is now getting added to my definition of romanticism.
I want to thank him for always being supportive of my decisions, for taking my side against others when I am right, for rebuking me honestly when I am wrong and unjust, for being my biggest critic and my strongest support system.
No, things haven’t changed dramatically and he has not definitely become the ideal husband of my dreams. I continue to fight with him for not surprising me with gifts, for being partial to me as compared to others. However these fights don’t drift us apart anymore. Now we shrug them off with a hearty laugh.
text of your post here. Do not share a link or attach a word doc
read more...
This post has published with none or minimal editorial intervention. Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
Please enter your email address