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I am who I am, what I am, and no, I don't need to justify my choices and life to anyone. I am a woman and I am going to live life my way.
She wasn’t ever the geeky type, home science fascinated her,
She was the perfect homely girl, a happy marriage awaited her,
Today she cooks, she cleans, she paints, she knits,
She tends to her husband and both her kids.
She is their pillar of strength when the going gets tough,
But the relatives commiserate, she doesn’t work, she is a housewife,
No, she just ain’t smart enough.
She was bashful, short dresses and loud parties were not her scene,
She wore bindi, salwar and long hair, she was raised traditional I mean.
She is proficient in her job now, beauty and brains combined,
She doesn’t speak much, her colleagues find her gentle and kind.
She doesn’t visit parlours, hates the late night stuff,
But boys her age label her BEHENJI, she doesn’t mix, she doesn’t socialize,
Oh, she just ain’t mod enough.
She had always been loud and cheery, an instant hit with her classmates,
She could light up a gloomy day, a rock star, fan of DIRE STRAITS.
In college now, she is gregarious and parties hard with friends,
She is a fashionista, wears her makeup right and dons the latest trends.
Young men swoon over her, take her for romantic fluff,
But neighbours gossip, she cuts classes, mingles with boys,
Oh, she just ain’t sanskari enough.
She was always focused on studies, cleaning and cooking not her cup of tea,
She cracked her exams and interviews, forever the winner she wanted to be.
She is now a career woman, a pride of the working women fraternity,
She is independent, she juggles work and family, she is an epitome of modernity.
She takes all in her stride, even if she hits weather rough,
But the in-laws complain, not she, but her BAI manages the house,
Oh no, she ain’t homely smart enough.
I enjoy decorating my house, I am a homemaker and a hands-on mom.
I am a Plain Jane alright, I am conventional, is make up some kind of a norm?
I am what you call a party animal, I am contemporary, I sing, I dance, I make my life merrier,
I care for my husband and kids, I outsource the household chores, so can’t I have a career?
So all the dear men, family and friends, hear it loud and clear,
You might call me lazy, plain, dumb, arrogant, I don’t have to prove anybody here.
I know I am smart and I just don’t care, say whatever you wish to say,
Because at the end of the day, it’s my life and I live it, my way.
Image source: a still from the short film Ghar ki Murgi
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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