5 Women Tell Us What It Is Like To Be In A ‘Long-Distance Relationship’ With Their Moms

Spending Mother's Day away from home during a pandemic seems a lot, doesn't it? These people tell us about their 'long-distance' with their moms.

Spending Mother’s Day away from home during a pandemic seems a lot, doesn’t it? These people tell us about their ‘long-distance’ with their moms.

Mother’s Day, like so many other special days, celebrations and festivals, has been marred by the shadow of COVID-19. Self-isolation, social distancing, lockdown and quarantine seem to have become the new normal. And a lot of people are thinking of best delivery options to make Mother’s Day a little special for their moms.

The way we go about expressing our love and appreciation during this day will also be somewhat different. While many of us are self-quarantining with our families, some of us have been unable to make it home in time. This was either due to unexpected turns in travels restrictions and closure of international borders, among other circumstances.

The current scenario is different for those individuals who have been unable to go home. They have taken the time to reflect on the time spent with their families and particularly, how self-isolation has impacted their relationships with their mothers.

In these dark difficult times, we remember the long lost shells of our younger selves who depended on our mothers to shield us in the face of uncertainty.

Long distance relationship

For people away from home, we have had to rely on technology to stay connected with our mothers and loved ones. We take time to call them almost every day to cement our emotional closeness, especially when we can’t do so physically.

“As I have been living abroad for two years now, I’ve definitely been more accustomed to this type of long-distance relationship between my mother and I. Due to the pandemic, my family could not come to Europe and visit me during the Easter holidays and I was unable to go home, either.

“The uncertainty of borders re-opening and the ongoing situation means I may not be able to go back to Asia during summers, making our separation the longest it has ever been,” says Claire who is now self-quarantining in Germany and shares a very close relationship with her mother.

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A Ramadan away from home

As the holy month of Ramadan is upon us, Fanny and Ines reminisce about their families. They associate Ramadan as the time to celebrate and be with their families.

“I do miss home a little, especially with Ramadan and remembering all the other years of my life that we’ve broken our fasts together. No matter how I feel, waking up to a bright sun shining makes things a little easier,” says Fanny. She is currently in the Normandy, France and trying to find solace and comfort in the turn of the season and blue skies.

“Being away from my family and not being able to join them for Ramadan has been hard. But now, we call each other every day. As for my relationship with my mother, I think it got better because we never really get to express our feelings.

“But lately, as we have started to talk more, it was one of the first times we have told each other we miss each other,” explains Ines who was unable to return to Morocco. She is presently staying in her university town in France.

Love from across the globe

With many of us studying abroad, we now come to understand the root of our mothers’ concerns. We finally see it as a sign of their unconditional care, affection and love, especially from thousands of miles away.

“Being away from family during this unprecedented time can be really hard. My parents, especially my mom, is so worried, with me living across the globe. It’s very easy to take that worry as being somewhat annoying. But at the end of the day, it comes from a place of love.

With Mother’s Day coming up, I miss being home more than ever, and cannot wait to be back with family again,” says Smrithi who is currently social distancing with her flatmates in Vancouver, in the wake of India’s border closures and restrictions.

The power of memories

“While we physically can’t be present with our mothers, it is great to look back and appreciate little quirks and traits that make them unique and define them.

My mum is one of the strongest people I know. She is so humble, liberal, comforting and kind. When I’m with her, I get this overwhelming wave of comfort so naturally, it makes me fall asleep.

“She always smells like Shea butter and sweet pea, and wears silky nighties. Mum leaves small treats and mini touches all around the house for me to find, things that only she and I understand,” says Nila in a beautiful and emotional outpour as we discussed this.

“She helped me deal with so many traumatic incidents throughout my life, I’m so grateful that I get to call her my mum! I love her a lot,” Nila had to be in government-assigned self-quarantine in a hotel for two weeks before she can see her family.

Overall, Mother’s Day has proven yet again, how this global pandemic has altered human relationships forever, especially with some of the closest people in our lives as we consider their health and security. Perhaps, like many other things in life, we realise yet another constant we take for granted.

Mother’s Day 2020: Let’s look at Mom as a human being, with a persona more than just the mother that takes care of you, of the home, or also a working mom who tries to walk the fine line of work-life balance. Let’s look at the woman she is, and celebrate her this Mother’s Day, whether she is with you or staying away from you, during this period of lockdown. Let’s make Mother’s Day 2020 memorable for your mom, or if are mom.

Picture credits: Still from Bollywood movie Khoobsurat.

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About the Author

Shivani Ekkanath

Shivani is currently an undergraduate political science student who is passionate about human rights and social issues, particularly women's rights and intersectionality. When she is not viciously typing her next article or blog post, read more...

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