‘Learn To Let Go,’ And Other Life Lessons From The Diary Of A Warrior Woman

Posted: January 28, 2020

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From learning to love yourself to giving in to love once again, the last decade has taught us a lot. Here are a few lessons that we all need!

Every decade comes with its ups and downs. And each one has several lessons to teach us. I learnt a lot of things, not just in the last year but also in the decade as a whole. It taught me to love myself and give myself breaks every once in a while. And that I am just human.

With 2019, we not just ended a year but also an entire decade. The whole decade for me has been one of personal and professional struggle. It taught me a number of lessons. Here I would like to share some of them I learnt on my journey.

Life is unfair

That’s it. Period. And the earlier you accept this, the easier it will be to get up after every set back.

Bad things happen to good people. There’s no explanation. Don’t be a victim but emerge a victor.

Read

Read as much as you can, on as many subjects as you can. Knowledge never goes waste.

Always be critical of what you read. Question the concepts, understand them and don’t blindly follow anything.

Tough situations only make you strong

There will be days when you will feel like giving up and that’s exactly when you need to hold on and trust yourself. Don’t lose hope.

Things don’t necessarily get better, but you learn how to handle them better. I believe that each new day brings with it, the hope and chance to make the present better than yesterday.

Your situation is as bad as it seems

In that moment, whatever you feel is true, but don’t let it get the best of you. There will be people who say others have it worse. While that is true, it doesn’t lessen your pain or grief.

Express gratitude

Feel grateful for all the good things that have happened to you, and for the bad ones that led you to the good ones too. Gratitude and optimism are the best combination to deal with life.

Have faith in yourself

There’s a little voice inside you, it is the voice that will guide you through the toughest of times. Believe in yourself. And have faith. Faith will steer your ship through the stormiest of waters.

Things have a way of working out in their own time. So keep faith and listen to that voice inside you, trust it.

Save

Your parents have asked you to save numerous times and every time you try to save, you find a new expense. But as the old maxim goes, it is these savings that will help you on rainy days.

And obviously, help you in the future. You never know when the tables might turn.

Marriage is not the end all

It is not your final destination, being the best version of yourself if. When you’re 30, and still not married, relatives will make you feel like it is the end of the world. It isn’t. Really.

So, live your life on your own terms. Don’t let certain norms stop you from being the best version yourself. The best project you will ever work on, is you!

The ticking of the biological clock

Well, that makes one less kid in an overpopulated country. If your mom instincts are bursting out, then take care of someone who needs that care. Adopt a child or sponsor someone’s education. If you think you might still want to be a mother later, get your eggs frozen. We live in a scientifically advanced world.

At the same time, if you decide not to be a mother, that is fine too. It is your call, whether or not you want to be a mother. Don’t let other people and their expectations guide you and your decisions.

People are selfish

Everyone is selfish at some point or the other. And your parents are people too. There will be times when their interests will clash with yours. No matter how much it hurts, at that time, you may have to give in, mostly because you love them. That is unconditional love and you know for a fact that they love you unconditionally too!

Be emotional

There is nothing wrong in being emotional. When you try to express yourself, people will often take it as venting. At such times, it is not you that is the problem, but immaturity and the lack on understanding and emotional intelligence in the other person.

Maintain a journal

Practice journaling in any form- writing, painting, photography, sketching, gardening, dancing or just anything your heart calls to. Your art/journaling will help you heal, especially on your darkest days.

Don’t let achievement get to your head

Don’t be too cocky about your achievements. At the same time, don’t let the rejections go to your heart.

Every rejection is a door to something better. However, you will have to put in some work to get there.

Love doesn’t hurt

Being in love is a beautiful feeling and very rarely does it hurt. However, loving the wrong person definitely hurts.

Take Maya Angelou’s words to heart, “Have enough courage to trust love one more time, and always have one more time.”

Love yourself

Quite often, self care and self love are underestimated. Love yourself to the point where you don’t need anyone else to depend on. But when you do look for a partner, look for someone who complements you, doesn’t complete you. For you’re a complete human yourself.

Be your own reason to be happy and to stay motivated.

Accept people as they are

Accept them with all their flaws and their issues. You never know what someone has been through.

Be kind. And compassionate. Please, be kind, at all times.

People won’t always practice what they preach

Especially in academia, people don’t always practice what they preach. Practically all the fields are full of snobs and bullies who will look down upon you for the smallest of things. Ask these people to leave you alone and keep doing what you were doing.

Treat people well

Especially, your subordinates; treat them like you would want to be treated. In fact, treat them better. That is the secret to building an efficient team.

People will use you

People will definitely use to get things done their way. And this will end up making you feel like an idiot. But be vigilant and make sure that it doesn’t happen over and over again.

Stress will manifest physically

After a certain point, stress starts showing certain physical symptoms. Listen to your body and take care of it. It is the one thing that will be with you till the end.

Drink loads of water and have a good intake of food in its natural form. Exercise on a regular basis.

Let go

Lastly, perform your dharma (duty). Do your karma (rightful action). And LET GO.Learn from each new experience and live a beautiful life, we’ve only got one.

Picture credits: Pexels

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Neha teaches English Language and Literature, and enjoys her time in the classroom. She's

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