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Have you ever considered that it is okay to not be perfect at everything you do? This beautiful piece illustrates such a moment of realisation.
Have you been raised with the idea of perfection as something you should aspire to? Have you gone through a large part of your life berating yourself for not being the ideal daughter, the ideal mother, the ideal student, the ideal sister, the ideal insert-role-here? I did, and I arrived at a beautiful moment in my journey a few days ago that I want to share with you.
This moment was in a powerful learning: That it is okay to be imperfect, and that imperfection is not a crime.
These words were like music to my ears.
Growing up, I was not accepted for who I was, and I was expected to conform to an unrealistic and unfair version of myself, because that was what people around me wanted me to be, starting from my own mother and grandmother.
I am the youngest in a line of four children. For as long as I can remember, I was told that I had to be like my oldest sister, who according to everybody was perfect in everything she did: perfect behaviour, topper at school and right through her education, perfectly beautiful and so on.
I remember my mother and grandmother telling me that I had to imbibe all those traits from her. When my brother’s grades slipped (he was a topper too), my sister’s name was brought up again and we were told how we should strive to be like her.
A couple of days ago, I was listening to one of my mentors talk to a group of his students, myself included. He spoke about how our first lectures as coaches need not be perfect – and in fact, is ideally BEST if it is not perfect, because imperfection is the way we learn.
For the very first time in my life, I heard someone say that. It was as if all the beliefs I had were falling away from me. It’s okay, really. I don’t need to hold myself so rigid to be perfect, it’s okay to be IMPERFECT. It’s okay not to be a master of everything I do.
Thank you for this learning. This is a new me, and I feel so liberated and lighter, I don’t need to justify myself to anyone.
I am me, I now choose to be my authentic self. Today, I feel all the more happy and gratified at the fact that I work with several people around me to liberate themselves from their limiting beliefs, and it feels so validating to know that we can set ourselves free of beliefs that burden us.
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"There is a story and a vision which makes us gravitate towards cinema. Even as we worked as assistants on ads, we realised that cinema was our true calling," say Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh Raseen.
The Railway Men. Mili. Cuttputli. The Diplomat. Bade Miyan Chote Miyan. And more…
Let me introduce to you the talented designer duo who have worked on these, and can be considered today’s upcoming costume designers for the screen. Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh.
Having studied at NIFT, Gunpreet Kaur Mann sent her portfolio out to several designers. Her first gig was as an assistant stylist with Manoshi and Rushi, who also happen to be a designer duo. She worked on an ad film starring Saif Ali Khan and eventually landed a full time job with designer Vikram Phadnis. Years of experience as assistant costume designer followed, which eventually led her to getting a break.
A ‘thank you’ makes a lot of difference in the way any woman in your life sees herself in your eyes. It might even mean the world to her.
I have not received any appreciation in the past. Probably never will. This is the experience of ample women across the globe. The expectation to be thanked for all the sacrifices she makes to keep others happy has faded. Yet the urge to hear few words of acknowledgement always lingers.
There is never a day when she pushes off her own burdens. She knows not to give up on people she loves. Women in general, are givers by nature and hence, give without asking anything in return. They have been the care givers and lovers since centuries however receive no appreciation.
It will mean the world to your mother if you answer her calls. If your sister seems lost give her a hug and assure her about her strengths. Tomorrow, there might come a day when you would have to make your daughter feel empowered with few words of wisdom every now and then. For the children to feel wanted and loved, you must be able to spare some quality time with your wife and be present in the moment.
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