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Marriage can become a financial nightmare if young couples do not take stock of their money situation. Here are 5 important vows to take.
If you are in your 20’s and early 30’s, you have faced the onslaught of people’s wedding pictures on Facebook, their matrimonial hashtags and rosy pre-wedding photo shoots. While love and marriage can create heartburn in a lot of single hearts, marriage can become a financial nightmare if young couples do not take stock of their money situation.
Here are some vows, that every one seeking a happier marriage should take!
While many people think that space and privacy is necessary to a happy marriage, this does not apply to money matters. If you have undertaken the decision to jump into a life-long partnership, you might as well keep the books clear. Your partner should have access to financial details in the event of your death (morbid, I know, but important), nominees, account numbers, financial status, health insurance details and cover, as well as stuff you are doing for children and parents. I have seen women STRUGGLE deeply because their husbands controlled the purse reins to such an extent that they were paralysed. Tell your spouse everything – your life and that of of your dependents could depend on this.
Here is the truth. There can not be a relationship where both partners spend and save in exactly the same fashion. Your motivations and interests are completely different from your partner’s. Hence it is imperative, that in a relationship – you do not hand over complete financial access to your spouse. Always retain control over your login credentials, PIN details etc. This is not lack of trust but common sense – what if you had an emergency tomorrow and your partner had splurged out your account already?
It is ideal to have a Yours, Mine and Ours Account. Saves everyone a lot of trouble and having a joint account gives a non-working partner or stay at home partner more flexibility.
Bottomline: Your partner SHOULD know how much money you have put away but not necessarily have access to it IF they are in the habit of splurging and dipping into funds.
Most couples are conditioned to ignore deep questions on money management and financial habits till it’s loo late, and they find themselves in a condition where either their partner is: (1) Spending without a thought (2) Saving so much that you feel suffocated
Here is a handy list of questions you should ask directly or get a sense from your partners on:
There is a predictable pattern in reaching out to friends, relatives and parents for financial advice. This can be construed as interference by the other partner as well. Ideally, do your own investing as a unit or reach out to professional financial advisers who can guide you suitably. Self-medication can be a bitter pill to swallow when you find your finances mis-managed.
Typical financial arguments in a marriage are centered around saving and spending discussions. Investing due to complexity is trusted to one partner (in our society, the man). Hence partners spend all their time squabbling over things like – “Why did you buy a new phone again?” while:
Marriage is not just a union of two people and their families but also of two incomes and two financial futures.
As a couple you should tick the following boxes:
So, while you get your band – baaja – baaraat in place, don’t forget to assess your Income, Investment and Impulses.
Here’s wishing you wedded bliss (and a retirement plan once you get there!)
Image via Unsplash
Ayushi Mona co-leads Broke Bibliophiles Bombay Chapter, India's first offline reader driven community. She is a poet and writer who evangelizes Indian writing in English at the India Booked podcast and has also read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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