At A Very Dark Time In My Life, I Survived Only Because Of My Women Friends

Women’s friendships are crucial to their lives – these often lift one up and sustain us in dark times. A touching personal account.

It felt like I was in an abyss, a dark and endless one at that. Like I had been held underwater for far too long, while I struggled, fought and kicked for a breath of fresh air. It was like being punched hard in the stomach, reeling over with the pain, gathering the courage to get up and being punched once again – oh the vicious cycle.

It’s easy to say that these were signs of grief and trauma. I was engulfed in sorrow and was slipping more and more into the pit of misery and despair. I had to make a move and change the situation I was primarily responsible of putting myself in. But in doing so, I needed something. Not something monetary, but a push. Or perhaps a pull, a hand stretched out just far enough so as to assure me of its unwavering presence on the other end.

These hands had been there all along. I hadn’t been able to see clearly as the tears blocked my view from what lay ahead and around me. Those hands were signaling me to cross over. It took boundless courage and strength but I did it. I took the plunge! I was free!

It was in these moments of suffering that I realized the magnitude of female friendships. If not for those outstretched hands, I probably would never have been able to do what I did.

Yes, I had to take that step all by myself. Yes, I had to keep moving each day. Yes, I had no idea what I would do tomorrow. But these women, these firebrands, had shown me what it means to be a woman of substance. While I was losing faith in myself, they clung on to me like melting wax on a wooden surface. They made me realize the consequences of forsaking my self-worth in exchange for affection.

I was no longer delusional. What more did I need to stand upon?

The events of tomorrow are beyond my knowledge or control, but what I do hold power over is myself – today and tomorrow. I have realized now the intensity of kindness and generosity. The power of simply being there for someone who may be holding on just by a thread.

We women are powerhouses, the source of strength, power and courage. It’s time we realize this and stretch that hand out to another in need.

Image source: shutterstock

Misbah Quadri

Learn More