Anupama writes a letter to her 18-years old daughter. Read what she has to say.
It should not really matter if a mother is a working mom or stay-at-home mother. As long as we maintain a good balance between work and home.
Being a working mother, I get asked a lot of time – how do you give time to your kid? Doesn’t she feel lonely or left out? It must be very hard for her!
To all these questions, I have only one answer – I believe in giving QUALITY time to my daughter. I feel confident when my daughter showers me with hugs and kisses, tells me how much she is proud of me and how well I take care of her. That reaffirms my belief and also the fact that I do not need to give justification to others.
I am not a judgmental person at all and do not like to be judged either. But I don’t feel offended when I get bombarded with these questions. This confidence stems from the fact that I have a wonderful inspiration in front of me – my mom! Just like my daughter, I was an only child, and my mother used to work full-time. But still, she structured her work life so beautifully around me that I did not feel left out or deprived of her love even for a second. I knew that I was the center of her universe and her will power and ability to balance everything so well instilled the Quality vs Quantity belief in me.
I grew up with some beautiful memories: My mother always leaving a sweet note with the fresh cooked lunch she used to keep for me on the dining table before leaving for work, amazing delicacies that she used to pack for my school lunch box, celebrating each and every achievement of mine, whether big or small, propping me on a chair and talking to me while making dinner and many more.
To many people, these things may look small, but for the young child I was then, they had a profound meaning. It meant that no matter mater whether my mom is away from home for some hours or not, it is ME that she cares about and all the efforts she is making are for me. It made me felt loved and secure.
There are many other, small things but these are some of the significant things which have helped me bond strongly with my child. Nothing in this world makes me happier than seeing her write in her school notebook: ‘My mom is my best friend. She is the best mom in the world. She works very hard and takes very good care of me’.
So Working or SAHM – it’s totally one’s own decision and I feel it should be respected. At the end of the day, all of us wish the best for our kids and that ends the debate for me!
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Ever notice how only women need to worry about a “work/life balance”? Men never get asked this question about working or staying at home. As far as I’m concerned, the entire premise of the question is biased.
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