Keen to learn more about inclusive workplaces? Want to be inclusive of the LGBTQ+ community? Learn more & request an invitation for a very special 2-hour session here!
A mother, who has just found her footing back in her career after her first child questions- Do I really want a second child?
There is a tug of war going on in my head from the past few months, and I tried to keep it to myself hoping to find some clarity. As you can see, this whole keeping it to myself business is clearly not peeling any potatoes for me.
Hence, here I am thinking aloud about my mental maraca (read brain) which is filled with soft baby images. No, the images are not of a toddler, it’s of a tiny pink little pea-sized infant. Yes, I am going INSANE.
Weird as it may sound, it actually seems like a bigger life decision to have a second child than whether to have one at all. In the time, when more and more people are opting for a single child or choosing to have no children—especially working women—is this craving for another baby out of place? The biggest question we (me and my partner) are facing is the timing. I am just finding my feet back on the ground after the chaos of infancy and toddlerhood; my career is finally taking a shape. I am still not making a six-figure salary, but I do have a career, and I am enjoying it!
Should I forsake everything again to be changing diapers instead?
Should I forsake everything again to be changing diapers instead? Ideally, the time would be right when baby-1 starts proper school, I start freelancing, hubby buys an SUV, we move into a bigger house, and all that before I reach forty and travel to five countries.
Now who can beat that check-list!
I had a breezy first-pregnancy, but somewhere deep-down I am still not able to shake this overwhelming fear of starting from the scratch. From pregnancy to the middle of the night feedings, am I ready to do it all over again? Conversely, the feel of my changing body, intoxicating baby-smell, chubby cheeks and the whole process of infancy is too strong a feeling to put down.
What about my first child? How will he handle having a little brother or sister? How will he react? Will he be jealous? On the other hand, who will my little man turn to when we are dead? Can friends and relative replace the bonds siblings share?
Phew, I don’t know! I am as confused as when I started writing this post. How about you? How many kids do you hope to have? Did you have a hard time deciding on the second baby?
Do share your views with me!
Pregnant woman and child image via Shutterstock
Beer-guzzling, prawn-devouring, mother of a #sassafras boy and a fish-wife. Ex-physio, ex-MBA; future #writer and #mommyblogger. Loves to write on #Parenting & #lifestyle read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, indivisual posts do not necessarily represent the platofrom's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Devi has started feeling like a mother to her husband, who was always,... immature, or as Indians put it, “boyish”, and is only getting younger post his half-century.
Devi has started feeling like a mother to her husband, who was always,… immature, or as Indians put it, “boyish”, and is only getting younger post his half-century.
Yes, Devi is very angry today.
Devi tested COVID positive early this week, and she sincerely wishes that her husband Bechara and not she were sick.
But what if you could highlight the pleasure of eating a mango? Mango-eating has always been the stuff slurpy, sloppy moments are made of.
Someone once said, ‘A little coitus never hoitus.’ Or, as a passage from an ancient Indian text says, ‘The horse and mare, the bull and deer, form the high union, while the horse and deer form the highest union. On the female side, the elephant and bull, the mare and hare, form low unions, while…’
Apparently, the animals represent people who are trying to have a union, that is, sex. This passage shows how the ancient Indians knew a thing or two about the birds and the bees and the hares and the mares. We had passion or kaam. And we had the Kama Sutra.
As a parent, we do the best we can, yet sometimes things might go wrong. Why is the blame so often laid at the mother's door? Does it make her a bad mother?
As a parent, we do the best we can, yet sometimes things might go wrong. Why is the blame so often laid at the mother’s door? Does it make her a bad mother?
Motherhood is undoubtedly one of life’s most beautiful gifts but along with it comes a host of other things. People’s prying eyes and blaming tones, pointing fingers at the mother for everything and anything that her child does or doesn’t do. Is it fair to hold the mother responsible?
No doubt the mother is the one in whose shade the child spends his growing years, learns his first lessons from her, but why is she always the one who is blamed when the child does something wrong or something that does not meet society’s definition of ‘acceptable behaviour’. This makes her question herself time and again – is she a bad mother?
Job systems, created by men for men, need a complete revamping of the global work culture if working mothers are to have any kind of work life balance.
As life takes a turn and the journey from a girl to a woman takes a rollercoaster ride with motherhood, women often wonder if they are ready for it? Whether they will be able to handle it all? Working women go ahead with questioning the career sacrifices they will have to make once they take the big leap.
I mean, I have seen men sitting late at night, working at 2 am on projects in office, and women, even unmarried women, wondering that will they be considered less efficient if they leave earlier, since their bosses expect employees to be around 24*7. This is, after they finish more stuff in less time (Gosh! Are we safe? What do I say at home? I hope my boss doesn’t think I am not dedicated. Oh! These guys in the team just chatter till 12 pm in order to show they’re dedicated). That is how the gender system has been in offices all over the world.