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A mother, who has just found her footing back in her career after her first child questions- Do I really want a second child?
There is a tug of war going on in my head from the past few months, and I tried to keep it to myself hoping to find some clarity. As you can see, this whole keeping it to myself business is clearly not peeling any potatoes for me.
Hence, here I am thinking aloud about my mental maraca (read brain) which is filled with soft baby images. No, the images are not of a toddler, it’s of a tiny pink little pea-sized infant. Yes, I am going INSANE.
Weird as it may sound, it actually seems like a bigger life decision to have a second child than whether to have one at all. In the time, when more and more people are opting for a single child or choosing to have no children—especially working women—is this craving for another baby out of place? The biggest question we (me and my partner) are facing is the timing. I am just finding my feet back on the ground after the chaos of infancy and toddlerhood; my career is finally taking a shape. I am still not making a six-figure salary, but I do have a career, and I am enjoying it!
Should I forsake everything again to be changing diapers instead?
Should I forsake everything again to be changing diapers instead? Ideally, the time would be right when baby-1 starts proper school, I start freelancing, hubby buys an SUV, we move into a bigger house, and all that before I reach forty and travel to five countries.
Now who can beat that check-list!
I had a breezy first-pregnancy, but somewhere deep-down I am still not able to shake this overwhelming fear of starting from the scratch. From pregnancy to the middle of the night feedings, am I ready to do it all over again? Conversely, the feel of my changing body, intoxicating baby-smell, chubby cheeks and the whole process of infancy is too strong a feeling to put down.
What about my first child? How will he handle having a little brother or sister? How will he react? Will he be jealous? On the other hand, who will my little man turn to when we are dead? Can friends and relative replace the bonds siblings share?
Phew, I don’t know! I am as confused as when I started writing this post. How about you? How many kids do you hope to have? Did you have a hard time deciding on the second baby?
Do share your views with me!
Pregnant woman and child image via Shutterstock
Beer-guzzling, prawn-devouring, mother of a #sassafras boy and a fish-wife. Ex-physio, ex-MBA; future #writer and #mommyblogger. Loves to write on #Parenting & #lifestyle read more...
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
As long as teachers are competent in their job, and adhere to the workplace code of conduct, how does it matter what they do in their personal lives?
A 30 year old Associate Professor at a well-known University, according to an FIR filed by her, was forced to resign because the father of one of her students complained that he found his son looking at photographs of her, which according to him were “objectionable” and “bordering on nudity”.
There are two aspects to this case, which are equally disturbing, and which together make me question where we are heading as a society.
When the father of an 18 year old finds his son looking at photographs of a lady in a swimsuit, he can do many things. What this parent allegedly did was to dash off a letter to the University which states: