The Adult Indian Woman

Posted: June 27, 2011

If one were to go by reports like this one on a magistrate ruling that a 21-year old woman be returned to her parents, there is no such thing as the Adult Indian Woman. While 18 may be the legal age for attaining majority, every now and then, one comes across cases like this where courts pass orders giving parents custody of unwilling adult daughters.

The unfortunate thing is that many Indians will support this. Arguments come up like, is a 21-year old really ready to make the right decision for herself and so on. That is besides the point. No doubt, there are plenty of 21 year olds who will land up in relationships and marriages that they will regret later. Just as there are 21 year olds who will make choices that work for them. Parents can advise, help, approve or disapprove – but no one can or should force an adult to get married or move back home against their wishes. In this case I linked to above, it appears that this 21 year old had already been married to someone in Rajasthan, and she doesn’t want to join that husband either.

Which of course begs the question of whether at all she had consented to that marriage, or was forced into it. And force need not be physical – force can be emotional (I will kill myself etc) or the absence of real choices. Not preparing or letting a young woman face the world on her own by withholding education or knowledge is also a kind of force – it forces them to abide by parents’ diktats.

Check it out!

The question is, if our learned judges themselves will not recognise the validity of the adult Indian woman, what hope do we have? In this case, luckily the higher courts came to her rescue, but not every woman whose liberty is infringed upon is lucky enough to get there.

Aparna

Founder, Editor of Women's Web, Aparna believes in the power of ideas and conversations

Learn More

Comments >>

Comments

6 Comments

Unmana - June 27, 2011 at 4:14 pm

That can’t really be legal! Awful.

Reply
indian homemaker - June 28, 2011 at 2:46 pm

Today’s post on my blog proved that there are many people who will think she should be forced to obey her parents… I would like to know what eventually happens. I hope she is treated like an adult that she is.

Reply
Dola B - July 1, 2011 at 6:09 pm

An adult, be it man or woman, has the right to make their own choices. If the 21-year-old in question did not want to go to her spouse’s home, the court should have sought measures to rehabilitate her in some other way. Sending her back to her parents’ home is not a solution any which way.

Reply
aparna - July 2, 2011 at 3:38 am

Thanks all for your comments.

@Unmana – it certainly isn’t legal, but that’s how the interpretation sometimes seems to be.

@IHM – I wish! The “many people” includes some in the police and judiciary, so they are not always helpful either.

@ Dola – the thing is, in this case, the woman was not even asking for rehabilitation. She was comfortable staying with her classmate.

Reply
test - July 27, 2011 at 1:48 pm

test

Reply
Pingback: The Women Behind Women’s Web: Aparna V. Singh | Women's Web: Online Community For Indian Women