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While many children are inherently mischievous, for some it may indicate a behavioural problem called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).
When 7 year old Rishabh’s mother was called to school to meet the class teacher and the special educator, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) was not on her mind. “I did know that he was naughty, perhaps a little more than the others, but I did not expect to be asked to get an evaluation done by a child development professional”, says Rishabh’s mother, Ratna Sharma.
Forgetting instructions, daydreaming in class, acting impulsively and constant fidgeting were something that Ratna was used to with Rishabh ever since she could remember. “I would tell him to do something and a little later, he would completely blank out what he had been told and get involved in something completely different. It was impossible to get him to focus on one task; he would lose interest within a few minutes and turn to something else.”
This distractibility and inability to concentrate was leading to trouble at school and low performance and grades as well as affecting his ability to connect with his peers. On getting an evaluation done, Ratna found out that Rishabh had ADHD and he wasn’t just another naughty kid. Now she says, “I wish I had known what I needed to watch out for and that the school had picked it up earlier. I could have worked with him sooner.”
Kindergarteners have usually learnt to follow instructions, pay attention and sit quietly when asked to. They also begin to learn discretion, i.e. not to say the first thing that comes to their minds. But children with ADHD are easily distracted and impulsive, regularly fail to pay attention to directions, consistently underperform in school and are unable to play with their peers due to their inability to follow rules.
…children with ADHD are easily distracted and impulsive, regularly fail to pay attention to directions, consistently underperform in school and are unable to play with their peers due to their inability to follow rules.
Broadly speaking, children with ADHD can be categorised into three main types. The first involves children who are constantly talking and extremely frisky. To an onlooker, it may seem as if they are in constant motion; they cannot sit still. If they are forced to, they might tap their feet, drum their fingers or fidget and look around. Sitting in class is extremely difficult and they tend to run around even if instructed not to. They might be high-strung and constantly angry.
Such children don’t think before they speak or act and tend to interrupt conversations, blurt out inappropriate things, ask personal or irrelevant questions and make blunt remarks. The child might be moody and over-react. They may blurt out answers in class without waiting to hear the entire question, won’t wait for their turn at play, have temper tantrums and outbursts and most importantly, do not take time to solve a problem, making guesses instead. Thus they might be perceived as rude, disrespectful or weird.
Another category is children who are quiet and lost in their own world, which might make them appear unmotivated. But, as they are peaceful and not difficult to handle, they generally get ignored. The third type would be a mix of the above two.
Other symptoms include lack of attention to detail, often making careless mistakes, finding it difficult to stay organized, plan and finish school projects as well as constantly misplacing or losing books, toys and other personal items.
Clearly it is difficult for a lay person to distinguish between ADHD and regular mischievous kid behaviour. One needs to check whether the symptoms are present across all situations at school, home and play.
These symptoms alone don’t necessarily mean that a child has ADHD. A child can show similar symptoms if she has certain medical conditions such as neurological conditions, sleep disorders or epilepsy, psychological disorders or has been through stressful life events.
Therefore, ensure that you go to a good professional to get a diagnosis done if you suspect your child has ADHD. ADHD often continues into adulthood, so don’t wait for your child to outgrow the problem. Treatment can help you and your child learn to manage and minimize the symptoms.
Children with ADHD may be frustrated and have low self-esteem. For Indian moms, it may take a lot of energy and patience to connect with him. The constant monitoring is frustrating and exhausting for many. Sometimes it feels like your child is running the show. There might be friction and stress for the whole family. But there are steps you can take to regain control of the situation while simultaneously helping your child make the most of her abilities.
Firstly, don’t blame yourself – ADHD is not caused by bad parenting. It is important to realise that children with ADHD are not disobedient on purpose.
There are many things parents can do to manage ADHD without sacrificing the natural energy, playfulness and sense of wonder unique in children. Firstly, don’t blame yourself – ADHD is not caused by bad parenting. It is important for Indian moms to realise that children with ADHD are not disobedient on purpose. They are often able to concentrate on activities they enjoy. But no matter how hard they try, they have trouble maintaining focus when the task at hand is boring or repetitive.
Medication is often prescribed but it might not be the best or only option for your child. Effective treatment should also include education, behaviour therapy, support at home and school, exercise and proper nutrition. A quiet environment to focus on school work or any task that needs concentration is essential.
A school setting requires the very things that a child with ADHD has a hard time doing – not because they aren’t willing, but because their brains just won’t let them. But that doesn’t mean they can’t succeed at school. Both parents and teachers can do their part to help children with ADHD thrive. Start with evaluating each child’s individual weaknesses and strengths, then come up with creative strategies for helping the child stay focused on a task and learn to his full capability.
On the brighter side, remember that ADHD has nothing to do with intelligence or talent. Children with ADHD are known to be highly imaginative and intellectually or artistically gifted.
Children with ADHD have multiple interests and also the energy and drive to pursue them all, if channelled properly. They do need more structure, consistency, clear communication and rewards/ consequences for their behaviour. And of course, like every child, they also need lots of love and encouragement!
Kiran Manral is an Indian author, columnist and mentor. She has published books across genres in both fiction and non-fiction. She lives in Mumbai. read more...
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I huffed, puffed and panted up the hill, taking many rest breaks along the way. My calf muscles pained, my heart protested, and my breathing became heavy at one stage.
“Let’s turn back,” my husband remarked. We stood at the foot of Shravanbelagola – one of the most revered Jain pilgrimage centres. “We will not climb the hill,” he continued.
My husband and I were vacationing in Karnataka. It was the month of May, and even at the early hour of 8 am in the morning, the sun scorched our backs. After visiting Bangalore and Mysore, we had made a planned stop at this holy site in the Southern part of the state en route to Hosur. Even while planning our vacation, my husband was very excited at the prospect of visiting this place and the 18 m high statue of Lord Gometeshwara, considered one of the world’s tallest free-standing monolithic statues.
What we hadn’t bargained for was there would be 1001 granite steps that needed to be climbed to have a close-up view of this colossal magic three thousand feet above sea level on a hilltop. It would be an understatement to term it as an arduous climb.
She was sure she was dying of cancer the first time her periods came. Why did her mother not explain anything? Why did no one say anything?
Sneha still remembers the time when she had her first period.
She was returning home from school in a cycle-rickshaw in which four girls used to commute to school. When she found something sticky on the place where she was sitting, she wanted to hide it, but she would be the first girl to get down and others were bound to notice it. She was a nervous wreck.
As expected, everyone had a hearty laugh seeing her condition. She wondered what the rickshaw-wallah thought of her. Running towards her home, she told her mother about it. And then, she saw. There was blood all over. Was she suffering from some sickness? Cancer? Her maternal uncle had died of blood cancer!
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